In Love with your Ghost
by Allie-kun
Summary: All human. OOC. Bella and Edward meet on MySpace. They become close friends and develope feelings for eachother. Problem? Bella lives in Forks and Edward lives in Chicago.
1. Ghost

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or MySpace. I wish I did because then I would be rich. Lol.**

**Chapter 1 -- Ghost **

There's a letter on the desktop  
That I dug out of a drawer.  
The last truce we ever came to  
In our adolescent war.  
And I start to feel the fever  
From the warm air through the screen.  
You come regular like seasons,  
Shadowing my dreams.

And the Mississippi's mighty,  
But it starts in Minnesota  
At a place that you could walk across  
With five steps down.  
And I guess that's how you started,  
Like a pinprick to my heart.  
But at this point you rush right through me,  
And I start to drown.

And there's not enough room  
In this world for my pain,  
Signals cross and love gets lost.  
And time passed makes it plain,  
Of all my demon spirits,  
I need you the most.  
I'm in love with your ghost.  
I'm in love with your ghost.

Dark and dangerous like a secret  
That gets whispered in a hush  
(don't tell a soul).  
When I wake the things I dreamt about you  
Last night make me blush  
(don't tell a soul).  
And you kiss me like a lover,  
Then you sting me like a viper.  
I go follow to the river,  
Play your memory like a piper.

And I feel it like a sickness,  
How this love is killing me.  
I'd walk into the fingers  
Of your fire willingly,  
And dance the edge of sanity.  
I've never been this close.  
I'm in love with your ghost.

Unknowing captor,  
You never know how much you  
Pierce my spirit.  
But I can't touch you,  
Can you hear it?  
A cry to be free.  
Oh I'm forever under lock and key.  
As you pass through me.

Now I see your face before me.  
I would launch a thousand ships  
To bring your heart back to my island.  
As the sand beneath me slips,  
As I burn up in your presence.  
And I know now how it feels  
To be weakened like Achilles,  
With you always at my heels.

This bitter pill I swallow  
Is the silence that I keep.  
It poisons me I can't swim free.  
The river is too deep,  
Though I'm baptized by your touch.  
I am no worse than most.  
In love with your ghost.

You are shadowing my dreams.  
(In love with your ghost)  
(In love with your ghost)  
(In love with your ghost)

**EPOV**

I pull into the garage in my silver Volvo, park it, and get my bag out of the trunk. My mom, busy with one of her design projects, greets me from the kitchen table as I come into the door.

"Don't eat too much before supper, I'm making your favorite: spaghetti," she tells me as I open the fridge.

"Okay, mom, I won't," rolling my eyes at her. I grab some pizza and eat it cold as I walk up to my room.

When I get up there, I toss my school bag on the bed and go over to my computer. It boots up quickly and I go to my MySpace. I have no new messages, no new blog posts, no new anything. For lack of anything better to do, I decide to just browse through the users, reading pages that catch my eye. On the fifth page of users, there's a pretty brunette with deep brown eyes and very pale skin named "Bells." I click on her page for a look, but it's private. All I know about her is that she is seventeen and lives in Forks, WA. _Damn. Oh, what the hell._ I send her a friend request and hope that she adds me. I go back to browsing users, soon getting bored with the lack of interesting people on MySpace. Groaning, I get up and decide to start on my homework. I turn on some Debussy for background music and take out my assignments.

**BPOV**

I sit down at the computer and turn it on. As I wait for it to boot up, I run carefully down the stairs, careful not to trip, and grab a glass of water and bring it back upstairs. I type in my password and wait for my settings to load. Waiting for my settings to load and my computer to connect to the internet, I unpack my school bag. Not much homework tonight, just a little reading for English. Good. I need a break. I go back to the computer and read my new e-mails. There's one from my mom, Renee, asking how my day went and if I have any plans for the coming week. I reply to her, saying that my day was fine and that Alice and Rosalie, my best friends, are going to be dragging me shopping at the end of the week. After sending that, I delete all the advertisements and general e-spam and connect to MySpace.

I read my new comments, one from Mike asking what I'm doing the coming weekend. Ugh. He just can't take the hint that I don't like him and won't be going out with him any time soon. Or ever. That works for me. I check my friend requests, a strange occurrence, seeing as I live in the rinky-dink town of Forks and no one ever talked to me back in Arizona. Huh, someone named "Sir Bites A Lot." WTF? He's seventeen and he's from Chicago?? Why would he send me a friend request? _Well, he is kind of cute_; he has green eyes and disheveled bronze hair, pale skin and a gorgeous crooked smile. I write him a message asking if I know him, explaining that I don't add people I don't know. Charlie would flip if he heard that I was adding random people online, seeing as he's the police chief here and is overly protective because of potential stalkers. Good thing my profile is private.

I leave the computer on and internet connected as I go downstairs and start making supper for Charlie and myself. I dig out the ingredients to this awesome pasta dish that I found online a couple days ago. Butter, onions, canned tomatoes, cream, peas, tomato paste, cooked ham, and penne. After combining the ingredients for the sauce and starting the pasta, I turn everything down to simmer until Charlie gets home.

**EPOV**

After getting my English assignment read and math done, I go back to the computer and hope someone is online. Nope, no such luck. I refresh my MySpace page. NEW MESSAGES. Huh. I click on it and it's from "Bells." _Hi, do I know you? I don't add people I don't know, sorry__. _I chuckle to myself _I wish_. I reply _Oh, sorry. No, I don't think we know each other. I was just browsing random pages and you looked cool.__Would it be okay if we just talked?_ I click SEND.

There's a soft knock on my door and my mother peeks her head in, "Hey honey, supper's ready."

"Okay, mom." I turn off my computer and head downstairs for supper.

**BPOV**

After setting the table, I go back upstairs to the computer. When I refresh the page, I see that "Sir Bites a Lot" has written back. _Oh, sorry. No, I don't think we know each other. I was just browsing random pages and you looked cool.__Would it be okay if we just talked?_I let him know that it's okay if we just talk to get to know each other. I ask him about who he is, his favorite music, school subject, color, favorite TV shows, and what he does in his spare time. After sending it, I realize how strange I sound, like I'm interrogating him, and hope that he doesn't get offended. Just after sending it, I hear Charlie open the front door. I turn off the computer and go downstairs, hoping that he doesn't see that I left the food unattended, and finish preparing supper.

**EPOV**

After supper, I go back upstairs and reboot my computer. I check MySpace first thing, hoping that "Bells" has replied. Thankfully, she has.

_So, tell me about yourself. What's your name? What's your favorite (or least hated) school subject? What's your favorite color? What's your favorite TV show? What do you do in your spare time?_

She made me laugh, interrogating me like that.

_Well, my name is Edward. My favorite classes are math and biology. I want to be a doctor someday. My favorite color is brown. I don't watch TV very often. In my spare time, I play piano and go on camping trips with my family. _

I click SEND and decide to go practice some piano.

**A/N: Song is "Ghost" by Indigo Girls. Please R&R. This is my first FanFic and I have no idea what I am doing, so please give me feedback (both good and bad). **


	2. Waking Up

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or MySpace or anything associated with them… well, except for a Twilight calendar I bought from Borders…

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or MySpace or anything associated with them… well, except for a Twilight calendar I bought from Borders…. obsesses**

**Chapter 2 -- Waking Up**

Distance and space allow emotions to age into faith  
Our bodies may end up alone but close

Are you there can you hear me  
Are you there can you feel me

Just in the way all your fingertips touch me  
They are healing  
One day we'll all fall prey

Are you there can you hear me  
Are you there can you feel me

Waking up good morning to you my dear  
I'm waking up enduring my biggest fears of  
Distance away (a weight) distance away

Are you there can you hear me  
Are you there can you feel me

Waking up good morning to you my dear  
I'm waking up enduring my biggest fear love

**BPOV**

The next morning I wake up too early, not able to fall back asleep. I decide that I might as well get up for the day. I boot my computer up, figuring that I'll have enough time till I have to leave. As it is starting, I go downstairs and grab some cereal from the kitchen and bring it back upstairs, eating some as I go. I sit at my computer desk and type in my password. I eat my breakfast as the settings load. As the internet connects, I go to my closet and sort through my clothes, grabbing a t-shirt, a pair of jeans, and a hoodie and get changed. I check my e-mails, of which there are none, so I go to MySpace. NEW MESSAGES. I click it and a reply from "Sir Bites A Lot" is waiting for me.

_Well, my name is Edward. My favorite classes are math and biology. I want to be a doctor someday. My favorite color is brown. I don't watch TV very often. In my spare time, I play piano and go on camping trips with my family. _

I click REPLY, trying to figure out how to respond. _I hope he's not a creep_. I laugh out loud; _he's probably a 65 year old man jacking off to my picture_. I figure it can't hurt replying to him, so long as I keep things vague.

_My name is Bella. My favorite class is English (I love to read!). I'm still trying to decide what I want to do, but I'm leaning towards journalism or possibly teaching English. My favorite color is green. I don't watch much TV, either. In my spare time, I take care of my dad, hang out with my friends, and read. So, what's with your display name?_

I click SEND and hope that my response doesn't sound too awkward. I look at the clock and freak out. Now, I am running late. I run to the bathroom and brush my teeth. I try to manage my mass of hair, but end up just putting it back into a ponytail. I grab my bag from my room along with my dirty dishes, which get tossed into the sink as I make my way out the door.

**EPOV**

I walk in through the back door to an empty house. _Thank God._ There's a note from my mom, Esme, on the refrigerator; _Carlisle and I will be going out for supper. Make yourself something, and please no parties._ I roll my eyes, knowing my mother is quite aware that I rarely party and that on a school night the likelihood of that is even less. With my mother and father out for the night, I get to make my own food for supper, which is always an interesting experience. I open the pantry door and stare, trying to figure out what to make. I can't decide, so I grab a box of cereal and pour it into a bowl with some milk from the fridge, then head upstairs to my room. I turn on my computer and immediately go to MySpace. NEW MESSAGES. I click it and there is a message from "Bells."

_My name is Bella. My favorite class is English (I love to read!). I'm still trying to decide what I want to do, but I'm leaning towards journalism or possibly teaching English. My favorite color is green. I don't watch much TV, either. In my spare time, I take care of my dad, hang out with my friends, and read. So, what's with your display name?_

I chuckle, remembering the event that gave me that nickname.

_It's nice to meet you, Bella. And my display name… well, last Halloween I decided to go as a vampire, you know, one of those old-school Dracula-esc ones with the long black cape with the high color, fake fangs, and dress clothes. My friends thought it was hilarious, so they started calling me "Sir Bites a Lot," and I just thought it was a fitting display name. _

I click SEND and get started on my homework, like the good student that I am…. _Yeah, we'll go with that._

BPOV

When I get home from school, I boot up my computer like usual. As it's loading, I unpack my schoolbag, sorting through my books and trying to decide what to do first. I put my English off to the side, figuring I'll do that last because it's my favorite and will be easiest. I take out my math and biology, trying to decide the lesser of these two evils. I decide to tackle my biology first, seeing as that will give me less of a headache. I turn to my computer and type in my password. As I wait for it to load and connect to the internet, I go downstairs and take a roast out of the fridge and put it into the oven to cook till Charlie gets home. I go back upstairs and check my e-mail. Still nothing, so I check my MySpace. NEW MESSAGES. NEW COMMENTS. My oldest and closest guy friend, Jacob, has left me a comment. I laugh at it. It's an icon that says _I wish you were here… in my room… on my bed… the lights are off… we go under the blanket… and I show you my new watch that glows in the dark!! What on earth were you thinking?! U pervert! _I laugh because it's so Jacob. I comment him back, calling him a dork.

Then, I check my messages and there is a new one from Edward.

_It's nice to meet you, Bella. And my display name… well, last Halloween I decided to go as a vampire, you know, one of those old-school Dracula-esc ones with the long black cape with the high color, fake fangs, and dress clothes. My friends thought it was hilarious, so they started calling me "Sir Bites a Lot," and I just thought it was a fitting display name. _

I laugh at his story; it's one of those strange but really cute things that most guys don't seem to understand anymore. I click REPLY.

_Hahaha. That's awesome. I don't really dress up for Halloween anymore. I mean, I would, but where would I go? _

_So, anything cool happen today? Chicago has got to be more exciting than here!_

I click SEND and get a start on my headache-causing Biology.

EPOV

After finishing my homework, I get back onto the computer and log onto MySpace, hoping that Bella has replied. _This is becoming an obsession_. NEW MESSAGES. From Bella.

_Hahaha. That's awesome. I don't really dress up for Halloween anymore. I mean, I would, but where would I go? _

_So, anything cool happen today? Chicago has got to be more exciting than here!_

I laugh out loud and click REPLY.

_Actually, not much has happened around here lately. I live in a quiet suburb where not much happens. The biggest thing that has happened here is that one of the people living down the street is a doctor and has been having an affair with one of his nurses, so his wife wants a divorce. Living here is like living in a little over-protected bubble. It kind of sucks. What all is new where you live?_

I click SEND and wander downstairs, looking for more to eat for supper.

BPOV

Supper with Charlie is a very quiet affair, neither of us being very outgoing individuals. Afterwards, I clean up and do the dishes while Charlie goes back to the living room and watches some sporting event. I go back upstairs to finish homework. Having finished my Biology and math, and now having the start of a tension headache, I start going over my English assignment. I have to go online and find some background information on _Pride and Prejudice_. I flip the monitor on, not having shut my computer down completely before, and start searching. It isn't very hard to find, so I print off some basics and other interesting information and decide to check MySpace real quick before reading and going to bed. NEW MESSAGES. From Edward.

_Actually, not much has happened around here lately. I live in a quiet suburb where not much happens. The biggest thing that has happened here is that one of the people living down the street is a doctor and has been having an affair with one of his nurses, so his wife wants a divorce. Living here is like living in a little over-protected bubble. It kind of sucks. What all is new where you live?_

I snort, it sounds like the small-town gossip around here, and click REPLY.

_Wow, that sounds like some of the gossip around here. And nothing is ever new around here; our school teams suck and never win anything, the school work is monotonous and pointless, and the closest town of any size is about an hour away. My closest friends are dragging me clothes shopping this weekend, which I dread, because it will be an all-day event of them trying to get me into skimpy, slutty looking clothing that they can wear, but I could never pull of while still looking as classy as them. I usually cannot afford the majority of the clothing I like, anyways, so it kind of sucks._

_Hey, do you have any kind of instant messaging service? That might make chatting easier and I won't have to wait for this stupid website to load._

I click SEND and power down my computer for the night. I get into bed and grab the first book that I can get my hands on and start to settle down for the night.

EPOV

After making myself a couple of sandwiches and eating them, I go back upstairs to my computer to check MySpace. NEW MESSAGES. From Bella.

_Wow, that sounds like some of the gossip around here. And nothing is ever new around here; our school teams suck and never win anything, the school work is monotonous and pointless, and the closest town of any size is about an hour away. My closest friends are dragging me clothes shopping this weekend, which I dread, because it will be an all-day event of them trying to get me into skimpy, slutty looking clothing that they can wear, but I could never pull of while still looking as classy as them. I usually cannot afford the majority of the clothing I like, anyways, so it kind of sucks._

_Hey, do you have any kind of instant messaging service? That might make chatting easier and I won't have to wait for this stupid website to load._

I laugh at her. She's obviously not like the superficial whore-ish looking girls around here. A girl who doesn't like shopping? Wow. _And_ she wants my IM name.

_Wow, a girl who doesn't like shopping? Are you sure you're feeling okay? Do you have a fever? Feeling dizzy? How have you been sleeping lately? You can tell me, I do want to be a doctor, you know._

_And of course I have IM, it's "EmoVampGuy08". Just send me a message whenever you get the chance. I'm always online, just have an away message up._

I click SEND then go and pick out a couple of movies to watch as I settle down for the night.

**A/N: The song is "Waking Up" by 10 Years. Please R&R! **


	3. Things I'll Never Say

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or MySpace. -sigh-**

**Chapter 3 -- Things I'll Never Say**

I'm tuggin' at my hair  
I'm pullin' at my clothes  
I'm tryin' to keep my cool  
I know it shows

I'm staring at my feet  
My cheeks are turning red  
And I'm searching for the words inside my head

'Cause I'm feeling nervous  
Tryin' to be so perfect  
'Cause I know you're worth it, you're worth it  
Yeah...

If I could say what I want to say  
I'd say I want to blow you--away  
Be with you every night  
Am I squeezing you too tight?  
If I could say what I want to see  
I want to see you go down--on one knee  
Marry me today  
Guess I'm wishing my life away  
With these things I'll never say

It don't do me any good it's just a waste of time  
What use is it to you what's on my mind?  
If it ain't comin' out, we're not going anywhere  
So why can't I just tell you that I care?

'Cause I'm feeling nervous  
Tryin' to be so perfect  
'Cause I know you're worth it, you're worth it  
Yeah...

If I could say what I wanna say  
I'd say I want to blow you--away  
Be with you every night  
Am I squeezing you too tight?  
If I could see what I wanna see  
I want to see you go down--on one knee  
Marry me today  
Guess I'm wishing my life away  
With these things I'll never say

(What is)What's wrong with my tongue?  
These words keep slipping away  
I stutter I stumble like I've got nothing to say

'Cause I'm feeling nervous  
Trying to be so perfect  
'Cause I know you're worth it, you're worth it, you're worth it  
Yeah...

I guess I'm wishing my life away  
With these things I'll never say

If I could say what I want to say  
I'd say I want to blow you--away  
Be with you every night  
Am I squeezing you too tight?  
If I could see what I want to see  
I want to see you go down--on one knee  
Marry me today  
Guess I'm wishing my life away  
With these things I'll never say

These things I'll never Say...

**BPOV**

I wake up early the next morning. This is becoming a regular occurrence. I get up and boot up my computer. As it is loading, I go to the bathroom and get ready for my day. After getting dressed, I log into my computer, then go downstairs and grab some cereal. I almost trip coming up the stairs, spilling some milk onto my shirt. _Damn_. I set the bowl down on my dresser with the napkin underneath and change my shirt. When I finally get to sit down at the computer, I check my e-mail. Nothing new there, which is very strange because Renee should have responded to me by now. I make a mental note to call her after school. Then, I check MySpace. NEW MESSAGES. From Edward. I get strangely excited about it, seeing as I don't even know the guy.

_Wow, a girl who doesn't like shopping? Are you sure you're feeling okay? Do you have a fever? Feeling dizzy? How have you been sleeping lately? You can tell me, I do want to be a doctor, you know._

_And of course I have IM, it's "EmoVampGuy08". Just send me a message whenever you get the chance. I'm always online, just have an away message up._

I laugh at him, and then log into my instant messaging account to IM him real quick before I have to go to class. I add him to my buddy list, then IM him.

:BellaNuit: Hi, this is Bella. You're probably in school right now (I'm leaving in a couple minutes), but I figured I should IM you. Well, I'll talk to you after school!

:EmoVampGuy08: Hey, I'm at school right now -gags-. I'll talk to you later.

After IMing him, I turn off my computer, grab my bag, and leave for school.

**EPOV**

I toss my nearly empty book bag onto my bed and head over to my computer. As it boots up, I turn my iPod on shuffle so it plays from all of the music on there. I log in and notice a new IM alert.

:BellaNuit: Hi, this is Bella. You're probably in school right now (I'm leaving in a couple minutes), but I figured I should IM you. Well, I'll talk to you after school!

:EmoVampGuy08: Hey, I'm at school right now -gags-. I'll talk to you later.

I smile to myself, amazed that she really messaged me. Glancing at the clock, I figure that she probably won't be out of school for another hour and half or so. I decide to do my homework for the night because no one is online.

About an hour later, I am finished with my work for the night and have nothing left to do. I go downstairs and grab some food from the fridge. My mom gives me the evil eye as I warm some pizza up in the microwave instead of eating the food she prepared (something that looks like a fancy version of meatloaf). I go back upstairs, eating my pizza as I go.

When I get back upstairs, I see that Bella is online. I am oddly excited by this. _She's something different_, I try to tell myself, _that's all_. But I know that's not all there is to it.

:EmoVampGuy08: Hey, Bella, how are you?

:BellaNuit: Oh, hi. I'm good. Yourself?

:EmoVampGuy08: I'm not bad. How has your day been?

:BellaNuit: Eh, it was okay. I didn't get much homework, which is good. I'm finishing up my college applications right now, so the teachers are easing off a little and encouraging us to work on our applications.

:EmoVampGuy08: I didn't get much homework, either. And I went through all that last year. Being a senior does have its perks; one of them being the lack of homework.

:BellaNuit: Lucky. I wish I was a senior already. Where are you going to go to college?

:EmoVampGuy08: I'm trying to decide between Dartmouth and Loyola University in Chicago.

:BellaNuit: Wow, Ivy League? You're going to be pre-med, right?

:EmoVampGuy08: Yeah, my dad went to Dartmouth, so he wants me to go there, but I'd rather go somewhere close to home. And yeah, I am pre-med.

:BellaNuit: That's really cool. I wish I could get into Dartmouth. I'm just applying to a few schools here in WA and a few where my mom lives in Phoenix. I understand wanting to be close to home, that's why I'm limiting mine.

:EmoVampGuy08: I just don't know anymore. My dad is really pressuring me. Pre-med wasn't really my idea, either. I really want to do music performance.

:BellaNuit: Why don't you do music, then? I mean, I know it's harder than that, but seriously; why not?

:EmoVampGuy08: I don't know. I tried suggesting it and it just felt like I was letting them down. My dad is a doctor and he really wants to have me working next to him. I understand that he just wants the best for me and for me to be successful, but I don't think it's really who I am.

:BellaNuit: Wow. I really don't know what to say. I mean, I don't really know you and I don't know your family. I guess it's just something you need to talk to them about.

:EmoVampGuy08: I know, I was just thinking that maybe I would do the first year and see how it goes.

:BellaNuit: That sounds like a good idea.

:EmoVampGuy08: Yeah. So… Tell me about your friends.

:BellaNuit: Haha, well, I have two close girl friends, Alice and Rosalie, and one close guy friend, Jacob. I met Alice and Rosalie when I moved here. Alice is like a tiny pixie; she's like four and a half feet tall with short black hair and she has more energy than a three month-old puppy on crack. Rosalie looks like a super-model; she's almost six feet tall and has long blonde hair. She doesn't take shit from anyone and has the habit of punching people in the nose if they insult anyone or hit on her. Both of them love to shop and love to drag me shopping even more. Jacob is actually the son of my dad's best friend, so we've pretty much known each other our entire lives. He's like my big brother, only he's younger than me…. If that makes any sense…

:BellaNuit: So, tell me about your friends.

:EmoVampGuy08: Well, I have two friends named Jasper and Emmett. Jasper is a very calm person and he's a really good speaker. He wants to be a lawyer, which I think fits him perfectly (though he's not a complete jerk like most lawyers). Emmett looks scary when you first meet him; He's over six feet tall and works out obsessively. But he's a really cool guy and wouldn't hurt a fly. I don't really have many female friends. Most of the girls around here are complete snobs and dress like whores.

:BellaNuit: Lol.

:BellaNuit: Oh, hey, I gotta run. My dad's home, so I have to make supper. Will you be on later?

:EmoVampGuy08: Yeah, I will. I'll talk to you later. Bye.

:BellaNuit: Bai!

I couldn't believe how easy it was for me to talk to her. Okay, so maybe it's just that it's online and I don't have to talk to her face-to-face. She was pretty funny and made me laugh with her descriptions.

**BPOV**

I log off my messaging service and turn off the monitor as I hear my dad walk in the door downstairs. Edward is a pretty cool guy, I think to myself, I hope his college thing works out for him.

After supper, I go back upstairs and log back into my messaging service. I log onto the University of Washington system and complete my application while multi-tasking by talking to Edward.

:BellaNuit: Hey, I'm back now.

:EmoVampGuy08: Oh hey. How did supper go?

:BellaNuit: Just like any other supper. My dad and I don't talk much while we eat. It's nice and peaceful.

:EmoVampGuy08: That's cool.

:BellaNuit: Yeah, I guess. I'm completing some applications right now.

:EmoVampGuy08: Oh? Where to?

:BellaNuit: Just to the University of Washington systems. I'm going to just copy and paste the information into the University of Arizona system. It's the same information and basically the same essay questions.

:EmoVampGuy08: Haha, yeah, college applications all tend to be the same. One place that I applied, though, you had to submit a taped interview thing where you show them your talents and how you're different from the other applicants. It was kind of a pain in the butt.

:BellaNuit: Sounds like, but it's good that they were different from the other colleges. One of the schools that I'm applying to has an essay question where you have to describe your favorite teacher. I think it's kind of strange that they ask you to describe someone other than yourself.

:EmoVampGuy08: Well, I guess they want to see how the teacher affects you, and depending on who that person is probably tells a lot about yourself. A lot of times when you like a quality in someone else, it's a quality you like in yourself. Same with qualities you dislike.

:BellaNuit: That makes sense. I guess it also shows writing style and won't make the applicant quite as uncomfortable as when asked point blank about him/herself.

:EmoVampGuy08: Yeah. Some people do like to brag, though.

:BellaNuit: True.

I look at the clock and realize we've been talking for a couple hours, mainly because my computer's so slow, and I still have some homework to do.

:BellaNuit: Hey, I should get going. I still have some stuff to do around here.

:EmoVampGuy08: Yeah, it's getting late. I should get to bed. Talk to you tomorrow?

:BellaNuit: Sounds great. Talk to you tomorrow.

:EmoVampGuy08: 'Night.

:BellaNuit: 'Night.

I log off my messaging service and shut down the computer. I go to my bed and pull out my homework, shove my bag off my bed, and flop down on the covers. _Edward's a pretty neat guy. Maybe I should accept that friend request tomorrow. _I slowly drift off to sleep to thoughts of Edward, my text book making a very uncomfortable pillow.

**EPOV**

I yawn as I shut down the computer. It is a bit later than I had planned to go to bed, but talking to Bella made time pass quickly. _I hope she accepts that friend request._ I change into my sleep pants and get under the covers. I drift off to sleep to thoughts of Bella. _She's just different, that's all_….

**A/N: Song is "Things I'll Never Say" by Avril Lavigne. Also, special thanks to my baby girl Katie for helping me write this chapter…. Okay, so she didn't help at all… mainly because she's a 5 month old golden retriever… But she did help me with one part of the conversation cause I asked her if it was okay and she bit my nose and then I changed it and she licked me… That counts, right? Lol. Anywho, R&R**** S'il vous**** plait! **

**And THANKS SO MUCH! to my reviewers. 3**

**To ****jenncrazyy909: Of course they will meet up! You'd think I'm going to let them live in oblivion forever??**

**To GladeSistas: My boyfriend thought up the names (even though he was being sarcastic at the time), so thank him. **

**To Arykianna Cullen: You have to admit, Edward is pretty emo most of the time. Lol.**


	4. Who We Are

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight! I wish I did… cause then I would have written a story surrounding a vampy named Edward who falls in love with the human girl named Allie… ahhh, the possibilities… -sigh-**

**Chapter 4 -- Who We Are**

Live my life around a picture  
Taken when we met  
Spending all of my time  
Chasing your silhouette  
For all we go through  
I don't wanna change you  
It's my mind running in reverse  
Trying not to forget  
Who we were  
Where it's at  
Here we go

And we break and we burn  
And we turn it inside out  
To take it back to the start  
And through the rise and falling apart  
We discover who we are

Struggling with my thoughts  
Change the locks inside my head  
Reading between the lines  
Of what you say, and what you said  
I turn the radio on  
To drown me out  
Driving through the night to nowhere  
Trying to forget  
Who we were  
And where it's at  
Here we go

And we break and we burn  
And we turn it inside out  
To take it back to the start  
And through the rise and falling apart  
We discover who we are

And it's all  
To the wind  
It's all  
In our hands

It's all  
To the wind  
It's all  
In our hands

**BPOV**

I wake up early, the light hitting my eyes at dawn. Groggily, I roll out of bed and plod to the computer. I turn it on and then head downstairs. I grab my cereal and milk and plod back up the stairs, still half asleep. I log into my user profile and wait for my settings to load. While waiting, I slowly eat my breakfast, trying to get my brain to wake up a little.

Finally, I have an e-mail from Renee. Apparently she and Phil were having a spontaneous romantic weekend, something I do not want to think about, but she goes into detail. I end up just skimming through, attempting to block those images from my mind; she is my _mother_, after all. I reply to her telling her how happy I am for her and Phil, my stepdad.

After responding to the e-mails, I log onto my MySpace. I go to my friend requests and add Edward. After adding him, I browse through his page. He's just a normal teenage boy. He likes music, though his tastes tend towards classical instead of modern. He likes books, which surprises me. He wants to meet whatever higher power is out there, just to ask a few questions, and a couple of people who have been famous throughout history.

Just out of curiosity, I click on his pictures and look at them. He has pictures of him doing various things and pictures of his friends. There are no pictures of him with any girls, which makes my heart do a little dance. In his other pictures, he looks even better than in his display. His smile is amazing and kind of makes my heart melt. His hair has the tendency to be a giant mess and fall over his eyes a little. Basically he's a gorgeous mess. Finally tearing my eyes away from his pictures, I look at the clock and almost choke on my cereal. _I'm going to be late!_ I leave my computer on and grab the first thing I grab from the closet, a pair of jeans, a t-shirt, an oversized sweatshirt, and some old Army boots. I throw them on and grab my bag, simply logging off the internet instead of shutting down my computer completely, and run down the stairs.

**EPOV**

I get home from school a little late, having hung out with Jasper and Emmett a little after school to grab a bite to eat and watch the cheerleaders a little. Emmett could have any of them, seeing as he is one of the star football players, but chooses to just watch from afar. Apparently none of them are up to his standards (meaning none of them can carry a conversation about anything other than hair products and makeup).

I toss my book bag onto my bed and turn on my computer. I sit down at my computer, a shooting pain going up my back. _That's not good_. I shift a little and the pain goes away. _Huh_. I ignore it and log into my computer. I log into my instant messenger then go to my MySpace. NEW FRIENDS. I look and see that Bella has added me to her friends. _Sweet._ I click on her profile and start scrolling through it. Some of her icons and sayings make me laugh. She has them about favorite authors and movies. In her comments section, there's an icon from a guy that says "_I wish you were here… in my room… on my bed… the lights are off… we go under the blanket… and I show you my new watch that glows in the dark!! What on earth were you thinking?! U pervert!" _I laugh at it, assuming that the guy is her friend Jacob. Even though I find it amusing, however, I am slightly jealous of their relationship. She would probably never go out with me because of the distance, but I still kind of like her and the idea of her with someone else makes me a little annoyed. Instead of dwelling on that, I click on her pictures.

There are pictures of her by herself and pictures with who I assume are Alice and Rosalie, mostly in formal clothes. They were probably taken at a Homecoming dance. There are also pictures with a guy who has tan skin and long black hair. I assume that this is Jacob, seeing as he has his arm slung around her and they're laughing. In another picture, they are in almost the same pose, with her smiling at the camera and him looking at her, almost lovingly. I make a mental note to ask about their relationship. I find a picture of just her and look at it, seeing her better than I could in her display picture. She is very pretty. Wait, that does not begin to describe it; she is beautiful. Where the light catches her hair, it turns slightly red-ish. It is full and wavy. Her eyes are the deepest brown, almost like you could fall into them. Her lips are full, and look _very _kissable. I blush slightly at the thought; a girl has never affected me this way before. I sigh and look at my messenger list, willing her screen name to appear. Amazingly it does, as if on commend.

:EmoVampGuy08: Hey!

:BellaNuit: Haha. Hey. How are you?

:EmoVampGuy08: I'm doing well. Yourself?

:BellaNuit: I'm okay. Today was pretty hectic. I don't know where my mind was.

:EmoVampGuy08: I know the feeling.

:BellaNuit: Yeah, I pretty much sleepwalked through today.

:EmoVampGuy08: I've done that before. It's actually kind of nice.

:BellaNuit: Usually, but not when you have a math test.

:EmoVampGuy08: Okay, true.

:EmoVampGuy08: So how much homework do you have tonight?

:BellaNuit: None, but Alice and Rosalie are dragging me out tonight to go shopping, so I won't be on for very long

My heart sinks a little at that, knowing that I won't get to spend my quality Bella Time for tonight. _Where'd that come from? Huh._ I shrug it off.

:EmoVampGuy08: Oh. Well, have fun with that, I guess. Try not to get eaten by any clothes racks.

:BellaNuit: Haha, I'll try not to. But if I'm not on later tonight, it's because Alice kidnapped me and I'm being held prisoner in her closet.

:EmoVampGuy08: Haha. Right, I'll call the police in Forks.

**BPOV**

I practically fall off my chair at his comment about calling the police.

:BellaNuit: I don't think you'd have to do that 'cause they'd probably already know!

:EmoVampGuy08: Why?

:EmoVampGuy08: Oh, right. Small town. News travels fast.

I feel slightly relieved at him answering his own question; I almost slipped and said who my dad was. I look at the clock and realize that Alice and Rosalie are probably on their way to pick me up.

:BellaNuit: Right, small town. Hey, I should get going. I'll be back on later tonight when I get home…. If that darn little pixie doesn't hold me hostage.

:EmoVampGuy08: Okay, I'll talk to you later. Have fun.

:BellaNuit: I'll try. Bai!

:EmoVampGuy08: Bye.

**EPOV**

-BellaNuit has signed off-

I sigh and shift in my chair, that shooting pain running up my spine again. Dammit! I shift again, willing the pain to go away. _If it still hurts like that tomorrow, I'll tell Dad_, I promise myself. I go back to staring at her pictures, having nothing better to do. I decide to surf through icons and find one to leave on her page for her. I flip through the pages on PhotoBucket and find one right away. It's a picture of a math problem and it says "Find X" with a diagram of a triangle where the hypotenuse is length X. The X has a circle around it with an arrow point to it saying "Here it is." For whatever reason, it makes me think of her and how much she seems to dislike math. I leave it in her comments, hoping to get a smile out of her when she sees it. I go back to staring at her pictures for a while. After realizing that maybe it is not healthy to stare at a picture of a girl I barely know on MySpace, I will myself to log off and go practice piano for a while until she gets home.

**BPOV**

Shopping with Alice and Rosalie should be considered an Olympic event, or at least a competitive sport. After 4 hours, FOUR HOURS!, of going through the mall with them, we finally are back home. I drag myself and the 3 shopping bags of stuff that Alice bought for me back into the house and up the stairs. I log into the computer and let it warm-up as I unload my bags onto my floor. There are too many clothes that I will be forced to wear in the future. I don't even know where I'd be wearing this stuff to. A club? But there are no clubs around here! I sigh and plop myself down at my computer.

I log into my instant messaging service and message Edward.

:BellaNuit: Hey.

:EmoVampGuy08: You're alive!

:BellaNuit: Just barely. I'm so exhausted, I'll probably go to bed here soon.

:EmoVampGuy08: Yeah, it's getting kind of late.

:BellaNuit: It is. My feet are killing me and my head hurts.

:EmoVampGuy08: That sucks. Take some Tylenol and get some sleep.

:BellaNuit: That's what I'm thinking. I guess I'll go now then.

:EmoVampGuy08: Okay, have a nice night. I'll talk to you tomorrow.

:BellaNuit: Yeah, you too. Talk to you tomorrow. Bai.

:EmoVampGuy08: Bye.

I log off my computer and drag myself to the bed and pass out, barely remembering to set my alarm before my eyes close.

**EPOV**

-BellaNuit has signed off-

I get up from the chair and stretch my back. I had waited up just to talk to her and now I am tired. I crawl into bed and make myself comfortable, thoughts of the beautiful Bella running through my bed as I drift off to sleep.

**A/N: Sorry this is a short chapter! Song is "Who We Are" by Lifehouse. Thanks to all my reviewers! I luff you all!**

**Sorry for not updating earlier. My schedule kinda kicks my butt sometimes (meaning Wednesdays SUCK). **

**Oh, and by the way, Edward and Bella will meet up… eventually.**


	5. You've Got to Show

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or MySpace. Dammit!**

**Chapter 5 -- You've Got to Show**

Yes it's true I've gotten very moody over you  
Don't think I don't sense your caution way across the room  
Or across the phone lines, big black ocean, or conversation brief  
We can't find a clear connection, and I can't get relief

Why don't we both agree we're both afraid and too afraid to say  
If I say count to three and move toward me, would you meet me half the way  
There are a thousand things about me I want only you to know  
But I can't do it alone, you've got to show

While you occupy me I command my dreams each day  
To bring you in me even thinly as the morning chases you away  
I half believe if I just picture us we will come true  
Wishful thinking or my dreams sinking half depends on you

Show me you are fully alive  
If you want to fly you take this dive  
If you want to kiss, kiss for real  
I'll give you back everything you feel

Drive in space that peaceful place  
You'd be my secret sharer  
Front and back and all around the thin margin of error  
Move too fast or move too or somewhere in between  
Navigate the perfect distance so your getaway is clean  
Why don't we both agree we're both afraid and too afraid to say  
If I say count to three and move toward me would you meet me half way  
There are a thousand things about me I want only you to know  
But I can't go there alone, you've got to show

**EPOV**

The next morning, I wake up in serious pain. I can barely move my lower body; I could barely _feel_ my lower body. _This isn't good._ I grope for my cell phone and call my mom, who is in a room down the hall. She answers groggily, mumbling a 'hello.'

"Mom, I can't move my legs," I say as calmly as I can. She hangs up and a second later she appears in my room. She has her phone in her hand and is yelling at, who I assume is, the unfortunate 9-1-1 responder. A troupe of EMT's appear a few minutes later, transferring me to a stretcher, and carrying me out to the ambulance. _Looks like I won't be talking to Bella today_, are my dreary thoughts as we pull away from my house and go to the hospital. Slowly, everything turns to black and the voices around me blur together. My thoughts turn incoherent as I drift into unconsciousness.

**BPOV**

I wake up late for me, or what would be early for anyone else, on Saturday. I flip on the computer and go downstairs as it turns on. I grab a bowl and pour some cereal into it, and read the not that is on the front of the fridge before grabbing my milk. Apparently, Charlie is fishing with his friend Billy all day, so I am on my own. I carry my cereal up the stairs and sit down at my computer. I eat my cereal as I log in and connect to the internet, logging into my instant messenger. I IM Edward, not really expecting him to be online.

:BellaNuit: Hey Edward, just saying hi. Message me back whenever, I'll be off and on all day.

His away message responds, saying that he is sleeping. I check my e-mail, a message from Renee in my inbox.

Hey sweetie--

So guess what! Phil got signed to a minor league team in Florida, so we're moving there. Isn't that exciting?! I wanted to call you to tell you, but I never know what your plans are up there! So give me a call when you get this so we can figure things out!

I love you!

--Mom

I sigh as I get up and walk downstairs, taking my now empty cereal bowl with to put in the sink. I pick up the phone receiver and dial Renee's number, hoping that she is both home and awake.

"Hello?" a male voice answers.

"Hey, Phil, it's Bella. Is mom there?" I ask.

"Oh, hey, Bells. Yeah, she's right here." I hear shuffling in the background.

"Bella?" my mom's voice asks.

"Yes, mom, it's me."

"So did you get my e-mail?" I can hear her voice barely contain her excitement.

"Of course, mom, that's why I'm calling," laughing softly at her childishness.

"Ohmygawd, Bella, you won't believe it!" She starts gushing about how Phil got signed and how they are both _soooo_ excited. Phil will be moving out there during the coming week and try to find a house for them both. She starts talking about what kind of house she wants and where she wants it. "So, what do you think of you, Alice, and Rose coming and visiting over your springs break? Phil and I could pay for your plane tickets and you guys could stay here!"

Her invitation catches me off-guard. She has never met Alice and Rose and I am half surprised at the fact that she remembers who they are. "Of course, mom, that would be _so_ cool! I'll call them later today and see if they can." I cannot contain my excitement now. It'll be my first time visiting anywhere other than Arizona and Washington, and I'll be doing it with my two best friends.

"Of course, honey, just let them know that we will be paying for their tickets and they'll be staying with us. If they want, their parents can call us anytime with questions; I'll be glad to talk to them." Again, she surprises me with her mom-ness, something that she does not display often.

I laugh quickly "Okay, mom, I'll let them know. I'll let you go now, I'm sure you need to start helping Phil pack."

"Okay, sweetie. Say 'hi' to Charlie for me and let him know that you will be coming here for break."

"Okay, mom. I love you."

"I love you too, sweetie. Bye."

"Bye, mom." I set the receiver down quietly. As the shock goes away, I start dancing around the kitchen, singing about how I'm going to Florida with my two best friends.

A couple hours later, I can barely contain my excitement as I pick up the phone to call Rosalie. I figure it is safer to call her first because Alice can get quite carried away when she is excited. The phone rings twice before I hear a woman's voice answer.

"Hello?"

"Hello, Mrs. Hale. It's Bella. Is Rose there?" I ask in a polite voice. Rose's mom is always so proper, it's hard not to be when talking to her.

"Yes she is, Bella, I will let her know." I hear her quietly set the phone down and as she walks away to get Rose, her heals echoing softly through the phone.

"Hello, Bella!" Rose's voice answers, breaking me out of my reverie.

"Hey, Rose! You'll never guess!"

"What? Tell me!"

"Phil just got signed to a team in Florida so now he and Renee are moving there and they invited us and Alice down for spring break!" I rush it all out quickly, too excited to slow down.

"REALLY?? That is SO AMAZING!" She practically screams into the phone.

"I know, right? Renee said she can pay for the tickets and we'll stay with them."

"OHMYGAWD! Let me go ask my mom!" I hear her excitedly talking to her mom in the background.

"My mom says it's okay, so long as she can talk to Renee about it."

"Of course!" I give her Renee's number so her mom can call. "I should go call Alice now and tell her!"

She laughs over the phone, "of course! She'll be so mad that she got told last!"

I laugh, knowing that she's right. "I'll see you at school on Monday. Have a nice weekend!"

"You too! Bye!"

"Bye!"

I set the receiver down and pick it back up again, dialing Alice's number. She picks up on the first ring, almost like she's expecting me to call.

"Hey, Bella!" Her voice excited.

"Hey, Alice!"

"What's new?"

I give her the same spiel I have to Rose about Phil and Renee. I cringe slightly when she screams into the phone.

"OHMYGAWD!! WE SO HAVE TO GO SHOPPING!"

"Of course, Alice, now go ask your mom if you can go." I laugh at her response, reminding her that she still has to answer to her parents. She sets the phone down and disappears, coming back a few minutes later.

"Mom says I can go!" She goes on rambling excitedly about all the things we have to do before springs break comes.

"Relax, Alice. It's only November!" I say laughing at her enthusiasm. We say our goodbyes, with me promising to go shopping with she and Rosalie the next weekend.

I go back upstairs to the computer and recheck my instants messages and e-mails. I sigh as I get started on my homework, soon losing track of time as I struggled with my math.

It seemed like weeks later when I am pulled out of my homework spell by the door closing downstairs and my dad's voice shouting a 'hello' to me from the foyer. I glance at the clock, noting how late it is, and run down to greet my dad. I take the fish he caught and put them in the freezer, taking out a frozen lasagna for his dinner. I put it in the oven, letting him know that his dinner is cooking, and go back upstairs. I check the computer, still nothing new. I'm slightly disappointed that I won't be talking to Edward tonight, but don't think much of it as I turn off my computer and settle down to read.

That was the first night I dreamt of Edward. We were laying in a grass meadow. It was sunny and pleasantly warm. We just talked and joked around. His laugh was musical, always making me laugh as well. Just when he leaned in to kiss me, I woke up, grasping my pillow to me. The sun hit me full in the face, making me wince as I opened my eyes.

I roll out of bed and turn on the computer. As it is booting up, I go downstairs to grab some cereal. There's another note on the fridge from my dad, saying that he is working today and will not be home till late. I bring my cereal upstairs and eat it while I log into and connect to the internet. I log into my instant messenger and see that Edward isn't even online. That's strange, I thought he said he's always online with an away message up. I quickly check my e-mails, and since there are none, I decide to finish my homework then go outside and read because it's nice and sunny.

The next day after school, I run upstairs, eager to talk to Edward. I boot up my computer, tapping my fingers on my desk impatiently. I log into my computer and connect to the internet, quickly logging into my instant messenger service. He's not online. I sigh in disappointment. With waning enthusiasm, I check my e-mail (nothing) and log onto my MySpace (still nothing). I waver back and forth, finally deciding to just suck it up and message him on MySpace.

_Edward -- _

_Hey, this is Bella. We haven't talked in a few days, and I was just checking to make sure you're okay. You've probably just been really busy, but I just figured I'd say hi. Sooo…. Message me back._

_--Bella_

I click 'send' and sit back into my chair, hoping that I don't sound crazy. He probably has just found some girl at his school and has been spending all his time with her. I go downstairs and start on supper, leaving my computer and internet connected.

After supper, I go back upstairs to check my messages. Still nothing. Sighing, I log off and shut down my computer, going over to my bed and starting on my homework.

**EPOV**

Slowly the darkness shifts to gray, color filtering back into my vision. A steady beeping comes from my right to the rhythm of my heart. I try to lift my hand, but it seems to be weighed down.

"Oh, honey! You're awake! How do you feel?" my mother's worried voice comes from my left. I turn my head and see her pale face. She looks tired and there are deep circles under her eyes.

"I feel okay, I guess" I take inventory of my body parts, wiggling my toes, shifting my legs, clenching my hands, shrugging my shoulders. I stretch my back and hiss out a breath when a dull pain goes through my spine. "What happened, mom?" I feel like a small child when I ask her.

"Honey, I'll go get your father. I'd rather him tell you." She leaves the room before I can respond. This must be pretty serious. She reappears a few minutes later, my father following behind her in a lab coat. He smiles comfortingly at me "Hello, son. How are you feeling?"

I look at him warily "I'm okay. What happened?"

He takes a seat next to me, his smile faltering. "Well… you see… you had a spinal tumor. That's why you had pain and numbness. We operated on you and have removed it completely, thank God. You will have some pain from where we went in and you now have stitches on your lower back. You might experience some pain in your back. You will have to remain on bed rest until your wound heals completely, and might need some physical therapy. I have spoken to your teachers and they will send your homework home once a week, which will allow you to still graduate on time. You should be able to go home in a couple days."

When he finished, I realize that I had been holding my breath. I let it out in a whoosh, trying to steady myself mentally.

"Okay, I understand." I relax slightly against the uncomfortable hospital bed, trying to think of a way to ease the tension. "Hey dad? Does this place have wireless internet?"

He chuckles softly "Of course it does. I'll bring your laptop in next time I go home."

I smile at him "Thanks, I just need something to do." I look outside, realizing that it's dark behind the curtains. "Hey, dad? How long have I been out?"

He looks at me uneasily "Well, it's Sunday night," he quickly glances at his watch, "Monday morning, technically."

"Seriously?" I ask in disbelief, my mind reeling.

My mother and father exchange a sad glance "Yes, unfortunately."

"Okay." I yawn, suddenly tired.

My father chuckles "You should get some rest; your body needs to heal."

"Okay, goodnight… or good morning" I mumble as I drift off to sleep.

I drift back to awareness and glance at the clock in my room. Only a couple hours have passed. I shift uncomfortably on the bed. My room is empty, but my laptop is sitting on the bed table. I turn it on and connect to the internet. I check my MySpace NEW MESSAGES. There is only one new message, from Bella. I smile to myself, happy that she sent me something.

_Edward -- _

_Hey, this is Bella. We haven't talked in a few days, and I was just checking to make sure you're okay. You've probably just been really busy, but I just figured I'd say hi. Sooo…. Message me back._

_--Bella_

I click REPLY and try to figure out what to say to her, how to tell her what happened.

_Bella --_

_Thanks for caring. Actually, I was at the hospital… still am at the hospital. Apparantly I had a tumor in my spine. I woke up Saturday morning, not being able to feel my legs. I was rushed here and just regained consciousness a few hours ago. I had surgery and they removed the tumor, so I'm okay now. I'll be in the hospital still for a couple of days and then I'll be on bed rest until the wound heals. So I'm in for a few exciting weeks of doing absolutely nothing._

_So what's new with you? We haven't talked for a could days. _

_--Edward_

I click SEND and push my computer aside, tired again. As I drift off to sleep, I think of Bella's beautiful smile and deep eyes. _Maybe she really cares about me_….

**A/N: Song is "You've Got to Show" by Indigo Girls. **

**What happened to Edward is what happened to my mom right after she graduated from high school. She wasn't quite as lucky and she is now a paraplegic and an amputee. My boyfriend actually did have to have surgery when we were first talking, and him being on bed rest gave us time to get to know each other. And I figured this story needed a little drama… not that more drama won't happen… drama's fun when you're not personally involved.**

**And it's not **_**that**_** hard to guess when they will meet… right?**


	6. Anything but Ordinary

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or MySpace. -sob-**

**Chapter 6 -- Anything But Ordinary**

Sometimes I get so weird  
I even freak myself out  
I laugh myself to sleep  
It's my lullaby  
Sometimes I drive so fast  
Just to feel the danger  
I wanna scream  
It makes me feel alive

Is it enough to love?  
Is it enough to breathe?  
Somebody rip my heart out  
And leave me here to bleed  
Is it enough to die?  
Somebody save my life  
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please

To walk within the lines  
Would make my life so boring  
I want to know that I  
Have been to the extreme  
So knock me off my feet  
Come on now give it to me  
Anything to make me feel alive

Is it enough to love?  
Is it enough to breathe?  
Somebody rip my heart out  
And leave me here to bleed  
Is it enough to die?  
Somebody save my life  
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please.  
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please.

Let down your defences  
Use no common sense  
If you look you will see  
that this world is a beautiful  
accident, turbulent, succulent  
opulent permanent, no way  
I wanna taste it  
Don't wanna waste it away

Sometimes I get so weird  
I even freak myself out  
I laugh myself to sleep  
It's my lullaby

Is it enough?  
Is it enough?  
Is it enough to breathe?  
Somebody rip my heart out  
And leave me here to bleed  
Is it enough to die?  
Somebody save my life  
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please

Is it enough?  
Is it enough to die?  
Somebody save my life  
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please.  
oh  
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please.

**BPOV**

_We're back in the meadow, the sun shining warmly overhead. I trail my fingers lightly over his pale skin, tracing his eyelids, his cheeks, his lips. His lips part slightly as I trail my thumb along them. I lean down, softly touching my lips to his, sliding my fingers back into his bronze-colored hair. He deepens the kiss, pulling my body on top of his, his hands gripping my waist tightly. He starts to slide his hand up under my shirt… and…._

I wake up breathless, breathing heavily. I blink quickly, my eyes adjusting to the light in my room. I switch my alarm off before it even has the chance to tell me to wake up. I boot up my computer and go downstairs, grab some cereal, and carefully bring it back up stairs. I log into my computer and connect to the internet. No new e-mails, so I check my MySpace. NEW MESSAGES. I click on the one from Edward.

_Bella --_

_Thanks for caring. Actually, I was at the hospital… still am at the hospital. Apparently I had a tumor in my spine. I woke up Saturday morning, not being able to feel my legs. I was rushed here and just regained consciousness a few hours ago. I had surgery and they removed the tumor, so I'm okay now. I'll be in the hospital still for a couple of days and then I'll be on bed rest until the wound heals. So I'm in for a few exciting weeks of doing absolutely nothing._

_So what's new with you? We haven't talked for a couple days. _

_--Edward_

I gasp softly, suddenly very afraid for him. My eyes widen at the realization that I'm starting to develop feelings for him. _Shit_. Not good.

_Edward --_

I pause, trying to figure out what to say to him. What do you say to someone who just told you that they had a tumor and just woke up in the hospital?

_Wow. I don't know what to say. I hope you get better. Are you going to still graduate in time?_

_And not much is new here. My mom and stepdad are moving to Florida because he got signed with some minor league baseball team down there. I'm going to go visit them over my spring break with my two best friends. I'm pretty excited._

_Anything new with you? Other than the whole hospital thing….?_

_Get better soon!_

_--Bella_

I click SEND and sit back, trying to calm my racing heartbeat. _So I like him. So what? It's just a crush… I barely know him… and he lives in Chicago! _I try to reason with myself, knowing deep down that how I feel about him is different. He would never like me back, though. Snap out of it, Bella!

I turn off my computer and grab some clothes for the day.

**EPOV**

I drift into consciousness, trying to figure out where I am. It all comes back to me in a rush; the numbness, the hospital, _the surgery_. I let my breath out in a _whoosh_. I look around the room, realizing that I am alone. I boot up my laptop, grabbing the remote and turning on the TV. I flip through the channels, finally finding the news. I watch it for a few minutes, finding out the things that I missed in the world for the past few days. With the new playing in the background, I log into my computer and check my MySpace. NEW MESSAGES.

_Edward --_

_Wow. I don't know what to say. I hope you get better. Are you going to still graduate in time?_

_And not much is new here. My mom and stepdad are moving to Florida because he got signed with some minor league baseball team down there. I'm going to go visit them over my spring break with my two best friends. I'm pretty excited._

_Anything new with you? Other than the whole hospital thing….?_

_Get better soon!_

_--Bella_

I smile to myself as I click REPLY.

_Bella -- _

_Fortunately, yeah, I will graduate on time. My teachers are sending my homework home for me to do. Luck me. _

_Florida sounds fun. It'll be a good getaway from Washington, I'm sure. I hope you have a lot of fun down there. _

_And nothing else is new with me. I just want to be out of here! I haven't been awake much, but I am already sick of this place. Maybe being a doctor wouldn't be such a great idea. Now at least I'll have a good reason. :)_

_I'll talk to you later._

_-- Edward_

I click SEND and glance at the clock as a nurse walks in.

"Glad to see you're awake. I'm just here to check your vitals and your doctor should be in here soon to see how you're healing." She smiles at me.

I shrug at her as she takes my chart and jots things down.

My dad walks in a few minutes after she leaves, smiling at me. I glower at him and he laughs.

"Hello, son. How are you feeling?"

I shrug at him "Fine, I guess."

He puts on his gloves and motions for me to roll over on my side. He pokes a little at the wound, causing me to wince and suck in a breath.

"You can roll back over now. It's looking great. You should be able to go home tomorrow." I sigh in relief as he keeps talking at me. "Esme should be coming in soon. It sounds like she'll be bringing you some supper so you don't have to eat the hospital food."

"Okay, dad. I'll see you later."

"Yepp." He calls absentmindedly over his shoulder as he walks out of my room.

I turn back to my computer, logging into my instant messenger. After surfing the internet for a few minutes, Bella logs in.

:EmoVampGuy08: Hey, there.

:BellaNuit: Oh! Hi! How are you?

:EmoVampGuy08: Someone's enthusiastic today. I'm fine, as good as I can be, I guess.

:BellaNuit: Lol. Yeah.

:EmoVampGuy08: I responded to your MySpace message a few minutes ago.

:BellaNuit: I was just about to check that. One minute.

:EmoVampGuy08: Okay.

I tap on the table as I wait for her to read my message.

:BellaNuit: Edward, that's great! I'm glad you can still graduate on time. That would really suck.

I chuckle to myself.

:EmoVampGuy08: Tell me about it!

:BellaNuit: haha, yeah.

We talked for about an hour longer about school, music, and other random stuff that seemed to just come up, before my mom came in carrying a bag with a plate in it.

:EmoVampGuy08: oh, hey, I have to go. My mom made me supper and she just brought it in. Will you be on later?

:BellaNuit: Yeah, I have to finish up supper here, too. I'll be on in a couple hours.

I put up an away message and close my laptop, shifting it a little and putting the plate on the table.

**BPOV**

After cleaning the table up after supper, I go back upstairs and log back into my instant messenger, having left the internet connected before. I IM Edward, even though he has an away message up.

:BellaNuit: Hey, I'm back from supper. Just IM me whenever you get the chance.

:EmoVampGuy08: I'm in the hospital, so I'm either sleeping or eating or bored out of my mind.

I log into MySpace, wondering if there is anything new. NEW MESSAGES. I click on my mailbox, hoping that it's from Edward. Sadly, it isn't. It's from Jacob.

_Hey, Bella. So I don't know if Charlie said anything to you, but Billy is having some people over this coming weekend to watch the game and I was wondering if you wanted to come over too. It gets so boring here with everyone zombie-ing about the game. I figured it'd be fun if you were here. We could watch a movie or something._

_Let me know!_

_Jake_

I smile at his invitation; it's something we've done a few times during the games that our dads like to watch. I message him back saying that I'll come over on one condition: I get to pick the movie. This is always the condition when we get together like that.

I surf the internet a little, not having any homework to do. After about a half hour, I get an IM from Edward.

:EmoVamoGuy08: Oh hey, Bella. Sorry I took so long.

:BellaNuit: Oh hey, no, it's okay. Don't worry about it.

:EmoVampGuy08: I kinda passed out for a couple hours there. I hate the pain medication they put me on.

:BellaNuit: Don't worry about it.

For the next two hours, we just talk about everything… and nothing. We talk about movies we want to see, bands we _love_, our families, and things we want to do.

I glance at the clock and realize how late it is getting.

:BellaNuit: So I know you don't have to get up at any particular time tomorrow, but I still have school.

:EmoVampGuy08: Yeah, that is one of the good things about being here.

:BellaNuit: Lol. Yeah. I'll talk to you tomorrow?

:EmoVampGuy08: I guess, yeah. My dad said I should be able to go home tomorrow.

:BellaNuit: That's awesome. I hope you can.

:EmoVampGuy08: Me too. I'll talk to you tomorrow.

:BellaNuit: Yepp! Goodnight. Get better!

:EmoVampGuy08: Thanks. Goodnight.

I sign off my messenger and shut down my computer. I change into my pajamas and get into bed. As I fall asleep, my thoughts drift back to the dream that I woke up to, hoping that it returns tonight.

**EPOV**

I put up an away message and flip through the channels, somewhat tired, but not enough to sleep at the moment. The only mildly interesting thing on is a romantic movie from the early 90's. The lead actress has soft brunette curls, large brown eyes, and pale skin. My thoughts drift to Bella, picturing her as the lead actress and me as the lead actor. I settle into myself, slowly falling asleep to thoughts of Bella and I…

**A/N: Song is "Anything But Ordinary" by Avril Lavigne. **

**So I just had my first Developmental Disabilities clinical for this year…. And I gotta say, it was better than I thought. My group has 3 guys in it, and my clinician was all like "make sure you really cover up because there's the possibility that they could take something sexual." I was all like **_**hooohh shiiit.**_** But it was cool. They remembered my name at the end of the session!**

**Oh, and BTW, there was an **_**Amadeus**_** reference in the Family Guy episode I'm watching. It's the one where Lois runs for mayor because the lake was so polluted. There's also a Super Friends thing in there. **

**Okay, notes to my reviewers:**

**Arykianna Cullen: When does every rich, spoiled, high school kid from Chicago go to Florida?**

**Ace Ryn Knight: luff -huggles-**


	7. Self Inflicted

**

* * *

**

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or MySpace. -sadface-

**Chapter 7 -- Self Inflicted**

Remember when I dove into the crowd  
And I got a bloody knee under my skin, a mark from wiping out  
It brings back the memories  
Every bone's been broken  
And my heart is still wide open

I can't stop  
Don't care if I lose  
Baby you are the weapon I choose  
These wounds are self inflicted  
I'm going down in flames for you  
Baby you are the weapon I choose  
These wounds are self inflicted  
One more thing I'm addicted too

With each scar there's a map that tells a story

what a souvenir of

Young love's like jumping out  
An airplane riding a tidal wave on an ocean of emotion  
My heart rips me wide open

I can't stop  
Don't care if I lose  
Baby you are the weapon I choose  
These wounds are self inflicted  
I'm going down in flames for you  
Baby you are the weapon I choose  
These wounds are self inflicted  
One more thing I'm addicted too

And I cover up these scars  
(We'll make it we'll make it but we break it)  
And I can't stop seeing stars  
(lets hope not die)  
Whenever you're around  
Around

I can't stop  
Don't care if I lose  
Baby you are the weapon I choose  
These wounds are self inflicted  
I'm going down in flames for you  
oohhh you are the weapon I choose  
These wounds are self inflicted  
One more thing I'm addicted to

I can't stop no I can't stop  
no I can't stop  
Ohh I'm going out in flames  
Ohh I'm going down in flames  
Ohhhh  
Baby you are the weapon I choose  
Baby you are the weapon I choose...

**EPOV**

I sigh as I lay back uncomfortably in my bed, my laptop balanced on a pillow. Bella should be on in a few minutes and I would be able to talk to her. Late afternoons and evenings were becoming the highlight of my life. Some of my friends would come visit me, but they were few and far between. I mainly talked to people online. But no matter who messaged me, the only person I wanted to talk to was Bella. I threw me arm over my face, annoyed with myself. _I can't believe one girl has me thinking this way, especially one who lives halfway across the country. It's not healthy_. Just then, a new window poppedpops up from my friend Tanya. She's a nice enough girl, but she is one of the spoiled, selfish brats that live around here; she has bottle-blonde hair, dresses only in top-name designer clothing, and drives around a new car practically every week. For some unknown reason, she likes me and has been trying to go out with me since we met in middle school. I start a conversation with her, trying not to lead her on.

As she rambles on the screen, my thoughts drift to Bella. Over the past week, I've learned so much about her.Bella. I learned that she loves to cook. Her mom's kind of flighty and when they lived together, Bella almost acted like the mother. I learned that her favorite books are all classics, but she is starting to get into some teenage vampire series called Twilight. Her dream job is to write novels, but will probably end up being a journalist because it will give her a semi-steady income. She used to have a hamster, but it died because she forgot to feed it and doesn't want to put another poor innocent animal through that again. She basically amazes me and I can't help but smile whenever we chat, but I know that nothing will ever come out of it.

**BPOV**

Everyday for the next week, Edward and I talked after school on instant messenger. When we talked, the time flew. I would get home and totally just vegge out in front of the computer, chatting and laughing with him. I really got to know him, not just superficial things, but really random things too.

For example, he was a dog person, but he tolerated cats. He loves his mom's chocolate chip cookies. His favorite food is spaghetti. He has a "pet" cactus because his mom won't let him have a pet because it might back a mess and he kills just about every other plant by not watering it enough. His favorite cereal is Honey Nut Cheerios.

Every time I learned something new about him, I fell a little bit more. The only reason I allow myself to fall for him is because he will never like me back and I will never meet him. He is like a celebrity crush, just slightly out of reach.

It's currently Friday night. I just got off the computer and am working on homework. My thoughts keep drifting back to Edward, but I really am trying to focus on this. Really. I am. I sigh, pushing my math book away and rub my temples, trying to force the oncoming headache away. The phone downstairs pulls me out of my reverie and I walk out of my room and towards the stairs.

"Bella, it's for you! It's Jacob!" My dad yells up at me. I bound down the stairs, careful not to trip, and take the phone from my dad.

"Hey, Jake. How are you?" I say breathily into the phone.

He chuckles, "I'm okay. Someone's happy to hear from me."

I laugh back, "Of course, Jake, I'm always happy to hear from you!"

"I was just checking to make sure you're still coming over tomorrow," his voice seemed to suddenly take on a nervous tone, as if he was unsure.

"Silly Jake, of course I still plan on coming over tomorrow. I plan on bringing the silliest chick-flick I can find and force it upon you!"

He laughs nervously, "Okay, I was just checking. I'll make sure to make plenty of popcorn and pick up some extra tissue," his voice returning to the teasing tone he usually uses with me. "So the game starts at two2, so I guess I'll see you a little before that."

"Of course. I'll see you then, Jake. Bye."

"Bye, Bella." He says softly as he hangs up the phone. I look at it a moment before hanging up, confused at his mood swings. I shrug it off and go back upstairs, and back to my homework.

* * *

The next morning, I wake up early. I pad to my computer and turn it on. As it boots up, I go downstairs to get some cereal. Charlie, the early riser that he is, is already in the living room watching TV, some pre-pre-game show, by the sound of it. I peak my head in to say good morning then go back upstairs. I log onto the computer and eat my cereal as my settings load. I automatically log into my instant messenger and IM Edward, hoping he is up.

:BellaNuit: Hey, Edward. You awake over there?

:EmoVampGuy08: Yeah, I am. My sleep schedule is sooo screwed up!

:BellaNuit: Well, you haven't really been doing much lately….

:EmoVampGuy08: True. This really sucks.

:BellaNuit: You've been saying that a lot lately.

:EmoVampGuy08: Well, that's because it does. I am so looking forward to leaving this damn house.

:BellaNuit: Yeah, being cooped up could really make you stir crazy.

:EmoVampGuy08: Yeah, well, it won't be too bad, I guess. Winters in Chicago tend to suck, anyways, we get a lot of snow. We don't go out much then.

:BellaNuit: Yeah, I bet. We don't get much snow around here. It usually turns into rain.

**EPOV**

Bella and I chat for another hour or so about random stuff, mainly about the weather where we live and how much we dislike it.

:BellaNuit: Hey, I gotta get going. I'm going over Jake's house in a bit. There's some game on and our dads watch them together. I still have to go shower and stuff.

My mind goes straight to the gutter as I think about Bella in the shower. I gulp, happy to be alone in my room.

:EmoVampGuy08: Okay, well, have fun. Will you be on later?

:BellaNuit: Yeah, probably. I have no idea when, though.

:EmoVampGuy08: Well, IM me anyways. I should be up.

:BellaNuit: Okay, cool. Talk to you later, then.

:EmoVampGuy08: Yepp, talk to you later. Bye.

:BellaNuit: Bai!

Bella signs off, leaving to my thoughts, which are currently drifting further and further into the gutter. _Dammit._ I lay back, forcing myself to think of things that are not Bella-centric, like the dead bodies on CSI, a show I have been watching since being home all the time. Thankfully, it works, and my heart slows down to its normal rhythm.

**BPOV**

I slip the DVD into Jake's player and sit on the floor in front of his bed. He's currently lounging on his bed, his legs dangling off the end. I press 'play' on the remote and flip through the previews to the DVD menu.

Jacob groans from on the bed behind me, "Jeeze, Bells. Not again! Haven't we watched this enough?"

I snicker at him, "You know that watching _Ever After_ while the game's on is a tradition." I glance up at Jake in time to see him roll his eyes at me.

I go back to watching the movie, eating popcorn out of the bowl sitting behind me on the bed. About halfway through, I feel him shift behind me and his legs hang off the edge next to me and his fingers start play with my hair. I lean my head against his knee, smiling contentedly. We remain like this till the end of the movie. When the credits start to roll, I press stop and get up to take the DVD out. Jake catches my wrist and I turn around to look at him. He's looking at the floor nervously.

"What is it, Jake?" slightly confused.

"Can I ask you something?" He glances at my face then quickly back at the floor.

"Of course, what is it?" still confused.

"Uh… um… I… uh… was just… uh… wondering if… um… maybe you would… uh… like to go to the… uh… movies tomorrow with me?"

"Sure, Jake. That would be cool." Even more confused now. Why was he so nervous about asking me to the movies…? "What is it, Jake?"

"I meant as in, like, a date..?" He looks up at me hopefully.

Now, it's my turn to stutter. I never really thought about Jake that way, but now looking at him, I don't know why. I push my feelings for Edward away, knowing that nothing will ever come out of it. Maybe this would take my mind off him "Uhm…"

He drops my wrist and stares dejectedly at the floor "It's okay, Bella. You don't have to spare me."

"No, Jake, that's not it. You kind of caught me by surprise." I laugh nervously. "It would be cool, Jake. I'll go with you… as your date."

He looks up at me, smiling and looking slightly surprised. "Thanks, Bells."

"What movie did you have in mind?" I ask timidly.

He runs his fingers through his shoulder-length hair and laughs nervously "Well, you see, I hadn't really thought that far ahead… I was kind of hoping maybe you would maybe pick the movie…?"

I giggle "Of course, Jake. I was thinking about maybe that one chick flick... the one with Meg Ryan… what's it called… oh, The Women!" I tease.

Jake groans and rolls his eyes. "Anything but that…"

I laugh at him, "I know, I was just teasing. How about Tropic Thunder? I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny."

He smiles at me, "Sounds good, Bells. I'll pick you up at 2?"

"Sounds good. See you then." I walk out of his room, knowing that the game is most likely done.

"Hey, Bella, The game's just finishing. We can leave in a couple minutes." My dad calls absentmindedly from the couch.

"Okay, dad. I'll be outside." I walk out onto the porch and sit on the top step, trying to sort out my racing thoughts and conflicting emotions.

**EPOV**

_Tanya just can't leave me alone! Jeeze! Can't she take a hint?! _I sigh as I lean back on my pillows, my laptop sitting on my lap. Tanya has been flirting shamelessly with me for the past hour, and it's mostly a one-sided conversation. A new window pops up, signaling someone new has just IMed me. Thank God. At least it's someone other than Tanya. I click on it and my heart starts to beat a little faster.

:BellaNuit: Hey, what's new?

:EmoVampGuy08: Not much, just sitting here.

:BellaNuit: That's cool.

There's a long pause. Something seems odd. Normally our conversations flow effortlessly.

:EmoVampGuy08: So… how was the game?

:BellaNuit: Oh, I didn't watch the game. Jake and I usually watch a movie while our dads watch the game.

:EmoVampGuy08: Oh, well, that's cool. What movie?

:BellaNuit: _Ever After._ It's kind of a tradition since I always pick the movie.

:EmoVampGuy08: Well, that's cool. I haven't seen that movie in forever.

:BellaNuit: Yeah, I only watch it when Jake and I hang out like that.

_Wow. He must like her. No guy would willingly sit through that movie without some girl he likes making him. _

:BellaNuit: Hey, have you seen Tropic Thunder?

:EmoVampGuy08: NahNaw, but I've heard that it's funny. Why do you ask?

:BellaNuit: Jake and I are going to see it tomorrow.

:EmoVampGuy08: Well, that's cool.

Suddenly, anger flares in me and I have to restrain myself from punching the wall. _What's wrong with me?!_

:BellaNuit: Yeah.

There's a long pause and suddenly, I'm very worried… and slightly jealous.

:EmoVampGuy08: Is something wrong?

:BellaNuit: No, everything's fine. Great, actually. Actually, he asked me to the movie as a date.

* * *

**A/N: Song is "Self Inflicted" by Katy Perry. **

**Please don't hurt me! -hides behind chair- Sorry about the cliffhanger, though. But… I am an Edward-lover, so y'all know they will end up together in the end. It's kind of funny because I did date someone else when Jer-bear and I were talking because I thought he didn't like me… and he was going to ask out another chick because he thought I didn't like him.**

**So… what's with all the acid-trippy Hershey's commercials, anyways? Like seriously… chocolate bunnies running along a chocolate field with a chocolate car driving by?? Dood.**

**LoVeElle: I'm from "the northern most suburb of Chicago" and I know a lot of people who went to Florida for spring break, so I figured it'd work in the story. And I kind of picture him living in the North Shore, so I figured they would do something lavish for spring break… lol. And you'll see what happens when it happens! Lol.**

**Sparklemesun00: Thanks so much! I was waiting to write a FanFic till I could think of something mildly original. **

**Aubrinaa: Thanks! I actually made a playlist for Twilight and most of these songs are on there. :)**

**Arykianna Cullen: Dork.**


	8. Damaged People

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or MySpace. Did you really think I did?**

**Chapter 8 -- Damaged People**

We're damaged people  
Drawn together  
By subtleties that we are not aware of  
Disturbed souls  
Playing out forever  
These games that we once thought we would be scared of

When you're in my arms  
The world makes sense  
There is no pretence  
And you're crying  
When you're by my side  
There is no defense  
I forget to sense I'm dying

We're damaged people  
Praying for something  
That doesn't come from somewhere deep inside us  
Depraved souls  
Trusting in the one thing  
The one thing that this life has not denied us

When I feel the warmth of your very soul  
I forget I'm cold  
And crying  
When your lips touch mine  
And I lose control  
I forget I'm old  
And dying

**EPOV**

:BellaNuit: No, everything's fine. Great, actually. Actually, he asked me to the movie as a date.

My stomach sinks and I feel my heart drop. _Well, you knew you never had a chance with her. Just chill._

:EmoVampGuy08: Well, that's cool. I hope you have fun.

:BalleNuit: Thanks. I'm kind of nervous, actually.

:EmoVampGuy08: Why's that?

:BellaNuit: Well, this will sounds really silly…

:EmoVampGuy08: What is it? Just tell me.

:BellaNuit: Well, this is my first date. With anyone.

:EmoVampGuy08: Wow. Seriously?

My mind reels, _she seriously has never been on a date before? But she's gorgeous!_

:BellaNuit: Yeah. I don't really know what to expect.

:EmoVampGuy08: Well, you've been friends with him for a while, right?

:BellaNuit: Yeah…

:EmoVampGuy08: Just act like usual and only do what you feel comfortable with.

_Why am I telling her this..??_

:BellaNuit: Yeah. I'm still nervous, though.

:EmoVampGuy08: Don't worry about it. 'Sides, if he hurts you, I'll personally fly out there and make him pay for it.

_Where did that come from?? Wait. That actually doesn't sound like such a bad idea…_

:BellaNuit: Haha, don't worry about it. If he hurts me, Charlie would kill him. Seriously. There are perks to having your dad be the police chief here and best friends with the guy's dad.

:EmoVampGuy08: True. But the offer still stands.

:BellaNuit: Haha. Thanks. I'll keep it in mind.

:BellaNuit: Hey, I should get going. I'm kind of tired.

:EmoVampGuy08: Okay. I'll talk to you tomorrow then.

:BellaNuit: Okay. Bai.

:EmoVampGuy08: Bye.

She signs off and leaves me to my thoughts, which are racing through my head. Suddenly, an idea pops into my mind. I press the intercom that my parents installed by my bed before I came home from the hospital.

"Hey, mom?" I talk into it.

"What is it, honey?" She sounds slightly alarmed.

"Don't worry mom. I just have a question for you. Can you come up here?"

She doesn't respond, but a minute later, she knocks quietly on my door before entering.

"What is it honey?" She says, looking around for something that might have upset me.

"I was just wondering…. What were you and dad planning on doing for Spring break?"

My mom pauses and thinks for a minute, "We haven't really thought about it much. We went to Florida last year, so we'll probably go to Mexico this year. Why?"

"I was just wondering… do you think we could possibly go to Florida again this year?" I ask, trying not to sound slightly desperate.

"Uh, sure, honey. Where do you want to go this year?"

I try to remember where Bella's mom lives… "I was thinking maybe Jacksonville? It's not quite as big of a spring break destination, so I don't think it will be quite as crazy," I shrug.

My mom shrugs back, not too concerned, "Well, okay. I'll talk to your father about it." She smiles at me, slightly confused. "Anything else?"

"I was thinking of maybe asking Emmett and Jasper if they wanted to come too. That way you and dad can have your time, too." I smile, knowing that my mom will drop it.

"Of course, honey. Just have their parents call me so we can talk about our plans."

"Okay, mom. Will do. Have a good night."

"You, too, honey." She walks out the door and closes it softly.

I sink back into my bed, suddenly very excited. _Maybe I should keep it a surprise… Just try to get as much information out of her as possible… Maybe I could try getting her phone number… I wonder if Emmett and Jasper might like her friends, it would make it an even number…_ As these thoughts race through my head, I drift off to sleep; the last image in my head is her beautiful smile. _Bella._

**

* * *

**

BPOV

Jake and I arrive at the movie theater 20 minutes before the movie starts to get a decent seat. As per usual, his arm is slung casually around my shoulders, but now it seems slightly more awkward because he thinks of it differently than I do. Jake wants to sit in the back row, but I know from Alice and Rose that it_ wouldn't_ be a good idea to sit there with him; Rose dubbed it the "make out row" and I wanted to avoid as much awkwardness as possible. We compromise by sitting smack in the middle of the theater. We talk easily, like usual, and quiet down once the credits start. I purposefully lean on the arm rest away from him, not wanting to encourage him. He stretches and not so subtly puts his arm around the back of my chair. _Dork._ The movie is funny, not the best movie I've ever seen, but still okay.

After the movie, we walk back to his car and drive back to my house. The ride back is silent and slightly uncomfortable. I can tell he is nervous, possibly about trying to kiss me, but that's just my imagination running away with itself. I find myself zoning out during the ride, daydreaming of what this would be like if I went with someone else. Mike at school has asked me out enough for it to possibly be considered a world record. With him, it would have been worse and he probably would have tried to make out during the movie, regardless if I wanted to or not. Edward would have been nice, but possibly awkward. I would have wanted to kiss him, though. _Where did that come from?_ I shrug it off and look out the window, surprised that we are already back at my house.

Jake stops the car in front of my house and we get out of the car. He walks me to the door and pauses on the porch, looking like he is going to ask me something. I wait for him to speak, but it never comes.

"So… I had fun tonight, Jake. What about you?" I ask, trying to ease the tension.

"Me too…. Do you want to go out again next weekend?" He looks at me hopefully.

I think it over for a second, thinking what could it hurt? "That would be cool, Jake. Give me a call?"

He smiles, obviously relieved, "Okay, will do. Bye, Bella."

"Bye, Jake."

He leans in to kiss me and I turn my head at the last second, having him kiss my cheek. He pulls away, looking slightly disappointed, but doesn't say anything. I open the door and step inside, quickly closing it, not wanting Jake to follow me inside.

I stop in the living room and say 'hi' to my dad and tell him about the movie. He asks about how things went, and I say that things went fine. We say our goodnights and I go upstairs.

As I boot up my computer, I change into sweatpants, getting ready for the night. I log into my settings then connect to the internet. I sign into my instant messenger and IM Edward.

:BellaNuit: Hello

:EmoVampGuy08: Hey, how was your date?

BellaNuit: It was okay. It was kinda awkward.

:EmoVampGuy08: Yeah?

:BellaNuit: Yeah, we've known each other forever, so it was kind of strange.

_It would have been better if you were my date._

**EPOV**

_I wonder how strange it would have been if I was her date…._

:EmoVampGuy08: Yeah, I bet. Did he kiss you?

_Wait, I don't want to know the answer._

:EmoVampGuy08: You don't have to answer that if you don't want to.

:BellaNuit: He tried, but I turned my head so he only kissed my cheek.

I sigh in relief, then a slightly panicked thoughts runs through my head

:EmoVampGuy08: Are you going to go on another date with him?

:BellaNuit: Yeah, I guess. I'll see how this next one goes.

_At least it sounds like she's unsure._

:BellaNuit: If the next one isn't as awkward, then I'll see if he wants to date more. But if it's just as awkward, then I'll try to let him down easy.

:EmoVampGuy08: That sounds reasonable.

:BellaNuit: Yeah, I just don't want to ruin our friendship and I don't want to hurt him.

:EmoVampGuy08: Yeah, but just make sure that you are happy too. Don't just lead him on because you don't want to hurt him because that will only hurt him more in the end.

_Way to go, guilt her._

:BellaNuit: Yeah, I know. I'll just see how this all goes.

:EmoVampGuy08: Okay.

:BellaNuit: So how was your day?

:EmoVampGuy08: It was okay. This one chick from school keeps asking me out, but I keep telling her no. It's kind of hard to go on a date with someone when you're on bed rest.

:BellaNuit: Lol. Yeah. You could just like do a movie night or something.

:EmoVampGuy08: True, but she's not one of those girls that you want to be in a room alone with for any length of time. To be honest, she kind of scares me sometimes.

:BellaNuit: Lol. Bug ol' Edwawd afwaid of a wittle giwl?

:EmoVampGuy08: No, not afraid of her; afraid of what I could catch by being in the general vicinity of her. Tanya isn't exactly known for being pure.

:BellaNuit: OOooooo. I seee….

_Now she thinks you only date sluts. And that you're probably slutty as well. Arrgh._

:EmoVampGuy08: Yeah. New subject.

:BellaNuit: Uhhh… How 'bout them Bears?

:EmoVampGuy08: Lol. Yeah.

We talk for the next few hours, we talk about everything and I ask as many non-suspicion causing questions as I can about her trip to Florida, trying to figure out as much as I can. Turns out, she doesn't know much about it, but she'll probably go to some beach party that her mom's friends are holding. I probably won't know them, so I'll just have to not-stalk her when we're down there. At about midnight my time, she signs off for the night, leaving me to my own thoughts. As I fall asleep, I think of her and how much I wish it was me that had gone on that date with her instead of Jake.

**

* * *

**

A/N: Song is "Damaged People" by Depeche Mode. And "How 'bout them Bears?" is something that my family says when something gets awkward and you want to make people laugh… because we're all Packers' fans.

**Ace Ryn Knight: Thanks! And the tension will continue to build… and build… and build… until they EXPLODE! Okay… so **_**maybe**_** that's not a good idea…**

**GladeSistas: I had to add that in. It was just screaming out at me.**

**RisingSun44: Rawr?**

**TwilightObsessedOECD: I already have that all planned out. Don't worry. And I'm pretty sure you'll love it.**

**Aubrinaa: My thoughts exactly…. Yum… :)**

**Arykianna Cullen: NO! Lol. Generally little spoiled rich kids around the Chicago area (this is including me, I should add) go on vacations to warm areas during spring break. Usually, the kids party and drink and tan and it's a looot of fun. I figured our main characters will be a little tamer, but it's still something they would do.**


	9. Thinking of You

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned Twilight and MySpace.**

**Chapter 9 -- Thinking of You**

Comparisons are easily done  
Once you've had a taste of perfection  
Like an apple hanging from a tree  
I picked the ripest one  
I still got the seed

You said move on  
Where do I go  
I guess second best  
Is all I will know

Cause when I'm with him  
I am thinking of you  
Thinking of you  
What you would do if  
You were the one  
Who was spending the night  
Oh I wish that I  
Was looking into your eyes

You're like an Indian summer  
In the middle of winter  
Like a hard candy  
With a surprise center  
How do I get better  
Once I've had the best  
You said there's  
Tons of fish in the water  
So the waters I will test

He kissed my lips  
I taste your mouth  
He pulled me in  
I was disgusted with myself

Cause when I'm with him  
I am thinking of you  
Thinking of you  
What you would do if  
You were the one  
Who was spending the night  
Oh I wish that I  
Was looking into...

You're the best  
And yes I do regret  
How I could let myself  
Let you go  
Now the lesson's learned  
I touched it I was burned  
Oh I think you should know

Cause when I'm with him  
I am thinking of you  
Thinking of you  
What you would do if  
You were the one  
Who was spending the night  
Oh I wish that I  
Was looking into your eyes  
Looking into your eyes  
Looking into your eyes  
Oh won't you walk through  
And bust in the door  
And take me away  
Oh no more mistakes  
Cause in your eyes I'd like to stay...

**BPOV**

The next month and a half pass uneventfully. I go to school, which is boring as usual. I hang out with Alice and Rose and we plan for break, which usually ends up with a trip to the mall. Jake and I are now officially dating, something which I am still unsure about. He is my best friend and I do love him… but sometimes when we kiss it gets kind of awkward. Especially when I start thinking about what it would be like if Edward was the one kissing me. I know that it is wrong and when thoughts of Edward start seeping in, I stop kissing Jake. The thing is that this has been happening more and more lately, and I am starting to consider calling it quits with Jake. He'll be heartbroken, but I just cannot handle it anymore. I resolve to do it after the holidays are over, but before we go back to school and before things with him progress any further than the kissing and mild groping we are doing now.

But today I have other things to worry about. Billy, Jacob, Sue, Leah, and Seth will be showing up any minute now and the turkey _still_ isn't done. _Stupid bird_. The turkey is always the last thing to get done. The potatoes have all been peeled and mashed and in a Crockpot, the peas are on the stove keeping warm, the sweet potatoes are cooling, the stuffing is staying moist and warm in the oven with the turkey, and cranberry sauce is chilling in the refrigerator. And the turkey is still not done. I sit on the floor in front of the oven and glare at the turkey through the glass window, as if this will make the turkey cook faster.

Charlie lets the group of people in as I glance at the clock for the fifth time in the last minute. They shout their 'hellos' to me as they take off their coats and shoes. Sue brings in, bearing multi-colored sugar cookies and sets them on the table. Jake comes and sits next to me, taking my hand and kissing my cheek. Just as he pulls away, the turkey is done, sparing me from the awkwardness that I just don't want to deal with today.

Dinner passes nicely, everyone eating their fill, including Seth and Jake, leaving me minimal leftovers. After everything is cleaned up, we start opening presents. Being the youngest, Seth plays Santa and hands everyone their presents. Everyone gets 'exactly what they wanted.' After all of the presents are opened, I go to get a bag to put wrapping paper in and another for the bows, but Charlie stops me. He hands me a present from behind his back and tells me to open it. I look at him suspiciously, but start to open it. Once the paper is off, I realize it is, oddly enough, exactly what I wanted. It's a Blackberry. I start jumping up and down and dancing all over the living room, much to the amusement of everyone there. That comes to an abrupt stop when I trip over my own feet and fall into the wall. I laugh it off and go get the bags.

The rest of the day is fairly uneventful. Everyone leaves around 9pm, after having a dinner of leftover turkey sandwiches. After everything is cleaned up, I go upstairs and boot up my computer and log into my instant messenger. I IM Edward, not really expecting a response, but to my happiness, he is online.

**EPOV**

The next month and a half passes slowly. I can get out of bed with the help of someone and I start physical therapy to regain the muscle strength I lost. Generally, I spend my time considering how I will pull off meeting Bella during break. Bella and I talk every day after she gets out of school. She and Jake are now officially dating and I have resigned myself to trying to be happy for them when we are chatting, but sulking about it the rest of the time. She tells me just about every detail of their relationship, not that I want to know it. According to her, he is an okay kisser, a detail that almost made me put my fist through the wall; in my opinion, Bella's first kiss should have been perfect. On my end, nothing happens with Tanya and her messages to me slowly taper off. She probably found some new guy to harass.

To my dismay, Bella has not been on yet today, but seeing as it is Christmas Day, I should not be so surprised. At that thought, Bella signs on. _Speak of the devil…._

:BellaNuit: Hello!

:EmoVampGuy08: Hey. Merry Christmas!

:BellaNuit: Merry Christmas to you too!

:EmoVampGuy08: How was your Christmas?

:BellaNuit: It was good. I made dinner for Charlie, Billy, Jake, and Sue's family. Sue's husband died this past year, so she and her two kids, Leah and Seth, came over for dinner. It was a lot of fun. What did you do?

:EmoVampGuy08: My mom made dinner for my father and me. That's about it. What all did you get?

:BellaNuit: Jake got me a bracelet with a wolf charm on it that he made. Sue and her family got me a gift card for a kitchen store in Seattle because they know how much I like to cook. And…

:BellaNuit: CHARLIE AND RENNEE GOT ME A BLACKBERRY!! OHMYGAWD IT'S SO AWESOME!

:EmoVampGuy08: That is so cool. Blackberries are a lot of fun. My parents got me one for my birthday last year.

:BellaNuit: Yeah, tell me about it. I'm so excited!

:BellaNuit: Can I have your phone number?

:BellaNuit: I mean, so I can see how it works and stuff. And since you have one, then I'll have someone to call with any questions about it.

My heart soars and I wonder how she read my mind.

:EmoVampGuy08: Sure, it's 847-570-2313. It's my cell number.

:BellaNuit: Thanks, I'll call you sometime.

:EmoVampGuy08: Awesome.

We talk for a few more hours about random stuff. Her tone when talking about Jake, both upsets and me and uplifts me. I don't want to come right out and ask her what's going in between then, so I figure I'll wait it out and see what happens. Part of me hopes that they break up so that I might actually have a chance during break, but the other part of me just wants her to be happy. Around 2 AM my time, we say our goodnights and she logs off. I lay back in my bed, thinking about Bella, falling asleep before I can even put up an away message.

**BPOV**

A week and a half pass and I try to figure out how to break up with Jake. I want to try to remain friends with him, but I know it will be difficult. Unknowingly, he provides me with an opportunity when he asks me to go see a movie the weekend before school starts back up again. I don't pay attention to the movie it all, all I know is it is some bad Christmas comedy. The car ride back is awkward and I fidget. I know Jake can sense something is up, but he keeps his conversation going with me occasionally nodding or saying the proper response. Somewhere between the movie theater and Forks, I nod off to sleep.

**JPOV **(Ooooo… weren't expecting _that_, now were you?)

The car ride back with Bella is making me nervous. Bella is fidgeting unusually much, which makes me nervous and talk more. After a while, I hear her breathing even out and I look over, realizing she is asleep. I turn the radio on, finding the only decent station that comes in around here and settle in. After a few minutes, Bella starts to mumble. I smile to myself and turn the volume down, wanting to hear what she has to say. My thoughts drift a little to when we were kids and we would pass out together and she would start talking. It always amazed me when she did that. I think I fell in love with her when she was asleep. She was over during a game and we were watching _Ever After_, of course, and she fell asleep and she looked like such an angel. She was beautiful, still is. That was about five years ago and up until a couple months ago, I was too nervous to even ask her out. Now that we are dating, I'm nervous again to tell her I love her. I glance at her again, resolving myself to tell her tonight when I drop her off and say goodbye. I reach over and gently take her hand in mine, rubbing small circles with my thumb. She shifts in her seat, her hair falling in her face. I let go of her hand and tuck her hair back.

"I love you." I tell her sleeping form, trying to gather my courage.

A small smile plays across her lips, making my heart soar. She mumbles something back, something that sounds like "I love you too, Edward." I start and shake my head, knowing that cannot be what she said. She doesn't even know an Edward. _She must have been garbling and you, stupid, must have heard what you wanted to hear her say,_ but the end didn't fit. I sigh, frustrated with myself, and place both my hands back on the steering wheel and stare out the dash.

Before I realize it, I pull up in front of her house and turn off the engine. I reach over and gently shake Bella's shoulders to wake her up.

**BPOV**

I slowly reenter reality. Looking around, I realize that we've pulled up in front of my house.

"Hello, sleepy head," Jake laughs at me.

I run my fingers back through my hair and look back at him and smile, "Hey."

"Nice nap?" he asks, a flicker of something I don't quite recognize runs through his eyes. Anger? Frustration? I nod in response to his question, preparing myself to break his heart.

"Hey, Jake…"

"Hey, Bella…"

We both start at the same time. I laugh nervously, "You go first."

Jake shakes his head, "No, you."

"Okay. Well… I don't know how to say this." I glance at his face, then down at my hands, which are wringing together in my lap "Jake, I think we should break up. It's not that I don't love you. You know that I love you. You're my best friend and practically my brother. But it's just getting very awkward for me because I see you as my friend, not my boyfriend." It all comes out and a rush. I pull in a shaky breath and look at Jake. He's staring out the window, pain and betrayal running across his face. "I'm sorry. I'd like to try and be friends, if that's okay with you. You're my best friend, Jake, and I don't want to lose you."

"I understand Bella. We can try, but just give me a little time," he says, still staring out the window.

"What did you want to say?"

"Nothing, it doesn't matter." He says, becoming more upset.

"Okay. Bye, Jake." I whisper as I get out of the car.

"Sure, sure." He mumbles. The pain in his voice breaks my heart, but I know that I am doing the right thing. I shut my car door and hurry inside.

On my way up to my room, I pop my head in and say goodnight to my dad and let him know that Jake and I broke up. He doesn't seem that surprised and says that we'll talk about it tomorrow.

I turn on my computer and change into pajamas as it boots up. I log on and IM Edward as soon as my computer allows.

:BellaNuit: Hey.

:EmoVampGuy08: Hey, how did your date go?

:BellaNuit: Jake and I broke up.

EPOV

_They broke up?_ I practically jump up and down on my bed. _Play it cool, she probably needs a friend._

:EmoVampGuy08: Really?

:BellaNuit: Yeah.

:EmoVampGuy08: Are you okay?

_Stupid question. Of course she isn't okay._

:BellaNuit: Yeah, I guess. I've been trying to figure out how to break up with him and it sort of just came out of my mouth. I feel bad for hurting him, but it was just getting really awkward.

:EmoVampGuy08: As long as you are okay with it. He should get over it, just don't rub anything in.

:BellaNuit: I know. I asked him if we could try to remain friends, and he said yeah but he needs time.

:EmoVampGuy08: Well yeah. Like I said, don't rub anything in. Try to keep your distance from him for a while and it should be okay. Let him let you know when he's read.

:BellaNuit: okay. Thanks.

:EmoVampGuy08: For what?

:BellaNuit: For listening to me and being my friend.

:EmoVampGuy08: Anytime. You know I'm here for you.

:BellaNuit: Thanks.

:EmoVampGuy08: No problem.

:BellaNuit: Hey, I should get going. I have school tomorrow.

:EmoVampGuy08: Have fun.

:BellaNuit: Thanks.

:EmoVampGuy08: Goodnight. Remember, anytime you need to talk. I'm here.

:BellaNuit: Goodnight. I'll remember.

I sit back and worry about Bella. She might be okay with it right now, but knowing her, she'll feel bad about it in the morning. Especially if she thinks that she's lost her best friend. I sigh and push my computer away, laying back and trying to fall asleep.

* * *

**A/N: Song is "Thinking of You" by Katy Perry. Sorry I didn't update sooner. I've been really stressing myself out and had a mini breakdown on Sunday; it wasn't pretty.**

_**Also, I don't know if y'all ever read my reviews, but razoreddie is my boyfriend. He's just being a dork.**_

**And random observance for today: I'm watching CSI NY on Spike. It's the episode called "Silent Night" and there is a special guest on here who is deaf and she plays the mother of a girl, who happens to have the same first name of me, who is killed. Well, I'm kind of excited because that woman was on The L Word, character named Jodie and played an amazing artist. She was prolly my favorite character on that show. For those interested, her name is Marlee Matlin and she is pretty much amazing. **

**cullendrive: Go Pack Go!**

**justm: All in due time. : )**

**Karren1109: Lol. Me too. It's been on constantly on Spike lately. **

**maren7885: I will! I will!**

**kaylacullen: Bella and Edward will kersplode from the tension. Lol.**

**Mrs Masen aka Amanda: Yeah, I grew up halfway between Chicago and Milwaukee, so I went to Chicago every other week or so too, mostly to like The MusicBox and other art houses.**

**Ace Ryn Knight: Yeah, I took the awkwardness from some of my past relationships too. There was this one guy that I pity-dated once (**_**not **_**a good idea, btw) and he thought we were bf/gf and it was really **_**really**_** awkward. **


	10. Dangerous Game

**A/N: OHMYGAWD! I have 100 reviews!! I luff you all! Srsly.**

**Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT OR MYSPACE!! How many times do I have to say it?!**

**Chapter 10 -- Dangerous Game**

You stand before me  
Now we stare eye to eye  
Before another second clicks away, one of us will die  
You reach for your metal as I reach for mine  
The sound of bullets flying through the air is followed by a cry

And there cryin'

What will we do, what will we say when it's the end of this game that we play  
Will we crumble into the dust, my friend  
Or will we start this game over again

The young man lies alone but fastened into the ground  
The sound of fleeing feet and the cryin' eye will be his last sound

But do we gain from all this?  
Now, was it worth a life? no  
We throw all of our hopes away  
And set our dreams aside

Now we're cryin'

What will we do, what will we say when it's the end of this game that we play  
Will we crumble into the dust, my friend  
or will we start this game over again  
It's coming back to me  
It's coming back to me

What will we do, what will we say when it's the end of this game that we play  
Will we crumble into the dust, my friend  
or will we start this game over again

**BPOV**

_I hate Valentine's Day. It's a stupid Hallmark holiday and has no point. It's just a stupid excuse for guys to hit on girls and give them chocolate and candy in hope that for one day out of the year, they might actually say yes_. I sigh and trudge up the stairs. Of course Valentine's Day wouldn't be so bad if a _certain someone_ was here and not in Chicago and I could celebrate with him. So I admit it; I am in love with Edward! I am hopelessly, unconditionally, and irrevocably in love with him. How sad is that? Seriously. I've never even met the guy. I toss my book bag on my bed, sit in my computer chair, and turn on my computer. I stare off into space as it boots up, thinking of his smile, his hair, his eyes, his body, his velvety voice_. Jeezey Chreezey!_ I log into my profile and connect to the internet. I log into my instant messenger and IM Edward.

:BellaNuit: Hey!

:EmoVampGuy08: Hey. How are you?

:BellaNuit: I'm okay. You?

:EmoVampGuy08: Same. How was your Valentine's Day?

:BellaNuit: I hated it. The guys around here are such pigs.

:EmoVampGuy08: How so?

:BellaNuit: These guys Mike and Tyler like me and are always asking me out. They just can't take 'no' for an answer. They kinda went all out and got me balloons and flowers and stuff and got offended when I said 'no.'

:EmoVampGuy08: That sucks. Guys can be pretty stubborn.

:BellaNuit: I can't disagree.

:EmoVampGuy08: So, are you anyone's valentine?

:BellaNuit: Haha. No.

"_I don't want anybody else  
When I think about you  
I touch myself  
I don't want anybody else  
Oh no, oh no, oh no"_

I grab my phone and smile as I pick it up. "Hello, there!"

"Hello" his velvety voice answers me. "So I was wondering… Since you don't have a valentine, I was wondering if you would be mine… my valentine." I can hear his nervousness in his voice and decide to tease him a little.

"Hmmmm…. I don't know… what would I get for it?" I tease.

He chuckles "Well, I was thinking, you know, the usual; I would do anything you want forever. Sound good?"

"Okay… And what do you want for it?"

"You would be my valentine, of course."

"Huh. Iunno. You don't want anything?"

"It doesn't matter to me."

"I'll make you a bracelet. It's the one thing I can do."

"Haha. Okay. Sounds good. But how would I get it?"

"I'll carry it around with me all the time and I'll give it to you if we ever meet."

"Sounds good."

There's a small noise at my window and I go look outside. To my surprise, Jacob is standing there. We haven't talked since we broke up. I open the window.

"What is it, Jake?" I call out.

"Can we talk?" He calls back.

"Sure, front door's unlocked."

He disappears around to the door and I remember that I'm on the phone with Edward.

"Hey, I'm going to go. Jacob wants to talk."

"Okay, well, I'll be online whenever you're done."

"Talk to you in a bit then."

"That we shall. Bye."

"Bye." I hang up the phone and prepare myself for this talk with Jake.

I can hear him coming up the stairs, so I take a seat in my computer chair. He comes in and sits on my bed, never making eye contact with me.

"So, what did you want to talk about?" I prompt.

"I just wanted to come and see you. See how you are. I haven't seen you and I was kind of getting lonely." He finally looks up at me and I can see the desperation on his face.

"Oh. I was starting to miss you too, Jake." I smile reassuringly at him.

"Really?" He answers hopefully.

"Yeah."

He breaks out into a glorious smile, but then it seems to falter. "Do you think we can go back to being just friends?"

"I think I can go back to being friends. Can you?"

He takes a deep shaky breath and looks down at his hands "I don't know."

I watch him, waiting for him to say something.

"Bella…." He starts. His voice gets really soft, "I've wanted to tell you this since we were 12…. I love you, Bella." He looks up at me, his eyes pleading. "I'm serious, Bella, I love you."

I stare at him, not quite sure how to respond. He looks back down at his hands. I don't know how long we sit there like that, but it seems like an eternity. I know I'm supposed to say something, but I don't know what.

"Bella, please say something." He whispers, still staring at his hands.

"I don't know what to say. I'm sorry, Jake. I love you, but as my best friend, not my boyfriend."

I can almost hear his heart breaking at my words. "Okay." He whispers. "I'm going to get going then. I just need some more time."

"Okay." I say at his back as he walks out the door. I stare at the door for who knows how long, hoping that this isn't the end.

**EPOV**

I start to worry when Bella hasn't been on in two hours. Wonder what Jacob had to say, hope it's okay between them. I get up off my chair and walk around my room. I can finally get up on my own and walk around comfortably. Generally, I still stay home though. I go in to school for a couple classes that were getting difficult missing like Calculus and Physics. The plans for spring break are finalized and Emmett and Jasper are just as excited as I am. I told them about meeting Bella and they're both hoping that her friends are hot. When they asked me about them, I just laughed and said that I didn't really know. I just knew that the next two months or so are going to be hell waiting to see her and not being able to tell her.

:BellaNuit: Hey, I'm back.

:EmoVampGuy08: How'd things go?

:BellaNuit: Apparently he loves me?

:EmoVampGuy08: Oh. Ok.

:BellaNuit: Yeah, he told me that he's loved me since we were like 12.

:EmoVampGuy08: Wow.

:BellaNuit: I told him I love him, but only as a friend. I'm worried that I really hurt him.

:EmoVampGuy08: Look, the thing is that he knew what he was getting himself into. Give him time and he'll probably be over it in a few months.

:BellaNuit: I know. I'm just worried about those few months before he gets over it.

:EmoVampGuy08: If he does anything, you are not responsible for it.

_That's all she needs, him offing himself. She would definitely blame herself then_.

:BellaNuit: I know.

After that, we chat for a couple more hours about random stuff, me still trying to get as much information out of her about spring break as I possibly can without sounding strange about it. I already knew that she is pretty oblivious, but I'm really starting to push the limits.

After Bella goes to bed, I sit back and let my mind wander. Eventually, sometime between thinking of Bella's smile and morning, I drift off to sleep.

_I open my eyes to a bright warm sun, a nice contrast to the sand beneath me. I look to my side and there is Bella, as beautiful as ever. Her pale skin practically glows against the dark blue of her bikini and her dark brown hair is spread about her. From the looks of it, she is asleep. I lean on my side and bring my hand to her face, caressing her cheek softly. Her soft lips part in a slight smile. I softly kiss her; her forehead, her eyelids, her nose, her cheek, and finally her lips. I sit back and watch her as she wakes up. She stretches slightly then opens her eyes._

"_Hello." She smiles at me, her voice still slightly fuzzy from her nap._

"_Hello" is my brilliant answer._

_She looks at me and pouts._

"_What?" I ask, wonder what could possibly make her unhappy._

"_You're too far away." _

_I chuckle softly and lie down next to her, wrapping my arms around her tiny waist. She snuggles close, placing her hand on my chest. She reaches up and kisses my lips; she tastes like the strawberries we were eating earlier. Slowly, her hand slips down my chest to my stomach, sending shivers down my spine. I wind my fingers into her hair and pull her closer, practically on top of me. Her fingers are still burning their trail down my stomach and start playing with the waste band of my swim shorts…_

* * *

**A/N: Song is "Dangerous Game" by 3 Doors Down and Bella's ringtone for Edward is "I Touch Myself" by The Divinyls. And y'all know this is rated "T" so I didn't finish his dream. You are imaginative people; you can finish it for yourselves. Sorry this chapter was short, the next few should be longer.**

**Btw, "Jeezey Chreezey" is a joke from Eddie Izzard. He's a standup comedian from England who wears women's clothing. He's pretty amazing. He was also in the show called The Riches and in random other movies, including Across the Universe playing the character Mr. Kite, ya know… the acid trip they're on with the circus people? Yeah, that's Eddie. **

**Anywho…**

**He does this sketch and it's God and Jesus talking to each other. And God goes "Jesus Christ!" and Jesus tells God to not say his name in vain so God goes "Jeezey Chreezey!"**

**And I'm currently watching **_**Ever After**_** because it's on E. I seriously have to watch this every time it's on. "You will marry Gabriella by the next full moon or I will strike at you anyway I can! I will simply deny you the crown and… live forever!" Sorry, that's the best line in the movie. And the second is "I shall go down in history as the man who opened a door!"**

**Mrs Masen aka Amanda: I knoooowwww. Arrgh. Chicago construction is sooo annoying. Something is always under construction.**

**Karren1109: See, I don't mind Jake sometimes, and because it was Bella, she wouldn't want to hurt him.**

**And She Loves Mr Jasper Hale: Thanks!**

**Kyla Cullen: Sorry. 'kayla' is just more common and spell check likes it… Lol. I really am sorry. And I already have all my songs chosen. But thanks for the idea. : ) **

**Disgruntled Female: Hahaha. It happens to me all the time and it's soooo annoying. I tell them I don't talk to people I don't already know and then they leave me alone.**

**Joykohl: Stalkers AREN'T GOOD! seriously. Yay Christmas? Time will fast forward, don't worry. : ) Spring break is only a chapter or two away and then it will last a few chapters.**

**Aubrinna: Haha. I didn't hear anything. : ) and I **_**try **_**to update every other day. Key word: **_**try.**_** This week that's just not happening.**


	11. Far Away

Disclaimer: -seethes- i do not own twilight or myspace

**Disclaimer: -seethes- i do not own twilight or myspace. -.-**

**Chapter 11 -- Far Away**

This time, This place  
Misused, Mistakes  
Too long, Too late  
Who was I to make you wait  
Just one chance  
Just one breath  
Just in case there's just one left  
'Cause you know,  
you know, you know

_CHORUS_  
That I love you  
I have loved you all along  
And I miss you  
Been far away for far too long  
I keep dreaming you'll be with me  
and you'll never go  
Stop breathing if  
I don't see you anymore

On my knees, I'll ask  
Last chance for one last dance  
'Cause with you, I'd withstand  
All of hell to hold your hand  
I'd give it all  
I'd give for us  
Give anything but I won't give up  
'Cause you know,  
you know, you know

_CHORUS_

So far away  
Been far away for far too long  
So far away  
Been far away for far too long  
But you know, you know, you know

I wanted  
I wanted you to stay  
'Cause I needed  
I need to hear you say  
That I love you  
I have loved you all along  
And I forgive you  
For being away for far too long  
So keep breathing  
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore  
Believe it  
Hold on to me and, never let me go  
Keep breathing  
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore  
Believe it  
Hold on to me and, never let me go  
Keep breathing  
Hold on to me and, never let me go  
Keep breathing  
Hold on to me and, never let me go

**BPOV**

Alice is dancing in front of me at the ticket counter, attempting to bribe the person checking our luggage. Alice and Rosalie managed to pack so much stuff that they went over their suitcase number _and_ weight. Seriously, we'll be there for a week and it's warm. How many clothes do they need? I lean on the counter and stare off into space, fingering the bracelet that I made for Edward. I ended up tying it on my wrist so I wouldn't lose it. It's black, blue, and green and made of braids and knots. Finally, Alice and Rose get their luggage straightened out and we head through the minimal security at the Seattle airport. We decide to find our terminal first then find something to eat and drink. Our flight doesn't leave till 8:40 AM, which is an hour away. Then there's the 3 hours flight to Chicago, a 3 hour layover at O'Hare then another 3 hours to Jacksonville. This is going to be a very long day.

We grab some coffee and sit at the gate for the next hour, chatting and being our usual random selves. Finally, the plane boards and we find our seats. I put my iPod ear buds in and turn on some music, drowning out the noise of the plane. Before I know it, I'm being shaken awake by a much-too-excited Alice, telling me that we are about to land in Chicago. I pack up my iPod and prepare to land. Landing is always my least favorite part.

After we get off, we again look for some caffeine, not that it'll do much. After that, we find our next gate so that we know to stick in that general area. I decide to take a seat while Alice and Rose check out the shops in the terminal._ Seriously, can they not shop for one day??_ I put my hood up with my iPod on and take out my book to read, giving a clear message that I don't want to talk to anyone.

About an hour later, Alice and Rose come back from their adventures with bags in hand. Alice seems to be in an even better mood than before while Rose seems to be more irritable. I put my iPod back in my bag and ask Alice what they got.

"Oh, just some souvenir stuff. There are some t-shirts and key chains and stuff like that." Alice replies happily.

"Okay, then why is Rose so pissy then?"

Rose raises one perfectly arched eyebrow at me. "What makes you think I'm being pissy?"

"Well, aren't you?" I ask. Alice can barely contain her giggles.

Rose sighs, "We were standing in line at one of the shops and this ass just comes up and starts hitting on me."

Alice cuts in excitedly "This guy was huge! He looked like a football player."

"Anyways… he has the nerve to smack my ass. Do guys actually think that's attractive?" Rose rolls her eyes for dramatic effect.

"Yeah, she pretty much chewed him out." Alice jumps in.

"Yeah, I did," she shrugs, "but he looked like a whipped puppy after that, so I gave him my phone number. Apparently he and his friends will be in Florida the next week, too."

"That's cool." I respond. I notice Alice practically bounce off her seat in excitement, "what is it Alice?"

"He has two friends with him and one of them is soooo hot! He has shaggy blonde hair and he's so gorgeous!"

_Great, just what I need; Alice and Rose setting me up with some guy on spring break._

"Yay," I respond, somewhat unenthusiastically.

"Ohmygawd! There he is!" Alice bounces, gesturing towards the line that is now forming to get on the plane, "No, don't look!" I see the big guy Alice and Rose were just talking about standing around. He really is huge; huge as in football player on steroids huge. Next to him is a tall blonde guy that I take to be the guy that Alice was mushing over. They are both talking to who I take to be the third friend. He's taller than the blonde guy but shorter than the huge guy. I can only see his back, but I like what I can see. He looks somewhat familiar to me. He is skinny in a toned and muscular kind of way with shaggy bronze hair. He turns to the side slightly, seeming to glance at us out of the corner of his eye. _Could it be…?_ Just then, first class is called and they board the plane. _Of course they're rich. _I sigh and start to gather my stuff and wait to board as well.

**EPOV**

We get to the airport about an hour and a half before the plane leaves. Esme and Carlisle decide to stay at the gate while Emmett, Jasper, and I wander around and kill time. We decide to go into a souvenir store and grab some reading material and something to drink for the flight. We end up standing in line behind a tall model-looking blonde and her short black-haired friend. They look familiar to me, but I just can't place them. They probably live around us and I have seen them at the mall or something. Emmett, being the douche that he is sometimes, decides to start hitting on the blonde. He uses all of the cheesy pick up lines in the book.

"Hey, babe. Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see!" Emmett starts.

The blonde just ignores him, turning her head away from us a little.

"Let's play carpenter! First we get hammered then I nail you." He tries again, unfazed.

She still ignores him and starts a conversation with her friend, obviously trying to get Emmett to leave her alone.

"You know how they say skin is the largest organ? Not in my case!"

The cashier is starting to glare at us, but the blonde just keeps on obviously ignoring us.

"What time do you have to be back in heaven?"

"You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy!"

"I wish you were a door so I could bang you all day long!"

Finally, she turns around and she looks _piissed_. "Are you fucking dumb?! Leave me alone! What the fuck is your problem?

Emmett just looks at her and smiles, "I'm sorry, I just thought you were pretty."

She glares at him for a moment longer before softening a little. "Okay, well, just leave me alone. Please."

"Can I at least know where you're going?" Emmett still tries.

She sighs, "Florida. Why?"

"No way! Me too! That's so cool."

She smiles and shrugs, "Yeah."

"Can we do something together when we're down there?" Emmett is still hopeful.

She glances at her friend, "I guess. Look, here's my number." She takes his phone and puts her name and number in it. "Give me a call. There are three of us all together, so it would be an even number."

Emmett breaks out into a smile, "Awesome. Thanks." I am happy that Emmett has found someone, but I just want to be with Bella this week. Before the girls leave, Jasper leans over and whispers something to the little black-haired girl. She giggles and nods then they walk away.

We pay for our stuff and then wander back to the terminal. We walk back to Esme and Carlisle, who are standing around near the desk because the plane will board soon. We stand near them, but make our own conversation.

"So, Emmett, are you going to call that girl?" Jasper asks Emmett.

"Of course! Did you have a good look at her?" Emmett responds, slightly more enthusiastically than I would have expected.

"In all honesty, not really. I was more interested in her little friend." Jasper admits, blushing slightly.

"Awww… Jasper has a crush!" Emmett teases.

"Yeah, Jasper, speaking of which, what did you ask her?" I ask Jasper.

He shrugs and blushes a little. "I apologized for Emmett being a douche and I just told her that I thought she was beautiful and if she would get her friend to go out with Emmett here so I could see her again. Ya know, Em, it's not that hard to ask a girl out if you're not a douche." Jasper smirks.

Emmett laughs "But that's not as fun. And you know, Eddie, they do have another friend…" Emmett teases.

"You know I just want to meet Bella when I'm here." I respond, slightly irritated.

"I was just suggesting, ya know, just in case things with Bella don't work out." Emmett shrugs.

"Hey, there they are." Jasper motions with his head, not wanting to make much of a scene.

I turn slightly and glance over out of the corner of my eye and see the blonde and her friend talking to another girl. She is wearing a sweatshirt and has long wavy brown hair and pale skin. _Could it be…? Naw, what are the chances_? Before I can get a better look, we are called to board the plane. This should be a long and uninteresting flight.

**BPOV**

Alice and Rose notice me staring after the guys and smirk at each other.

"Seriously, Bella, what's wrong?" Rose asks.

I look at her, my surprise obvious. "You know that guy that I've been talking to? Edward? Well, the third friend of theirs looks exactly like him.

"Wow, Bella, wouldn't that be something? Just imagine if that was really him and he was going to Florida." Alice states.

"Yeah, that would be really cool. But it would never happen." I shrug. Just then, our plane is called, putting an end to our awkward conversation.

We board and walk through first class. Rose's ass gets smacked by the big guy and she stumbles, bumping into me in the process. I almost fall onto a guy sitting in one of the seats, but I catch myself at the last moment on his armrest. I brush his hand and I can feel a spark pass between us, like an electrical shock only pleasurable. I mumble an apology without looking up because I know I am currently a shade of dark red that is only seen on tomatoes or strawberries then hurry on before he can say anything. We find our seats and cram ourselves in them and settle into the flight.

**EPOV **

Since we are flying first class, we are called first. We board and settle ourselves in as the rest of the passengers file past. I busy myself with fiddling with my iPod, ignoring the people as they pass by. The next thing I know is that Emmett's laughter is peeling through the cabin and a small figure almost falls into my lap. She catches herself on my arm rest, brushing my hand. It sends a shock through my body that cannot be described with words. I look up in time to see her walking past. Again, I am reminded of Bella with her long dark wavy hair and pale skin, which is now blushing dark red. She walks past before I can get a good look at her. I shrug it off and return to my iPod, my thoughts drifting to Bella and the amazing week I plan on having.

* * *

**A/N: Song is "Far Away" by Nickelback. So I just saw the movie Igor, and it was ok. It had its funny parts and the music was really good. **

**Joykohl: They're friends on MySpace. I don't know about you, but I post pictures on there all the time. Lol.**

**Obsessive Reader09: hehehehe.**

**SnowChika: You are my best friend. I'm just gonna throw that out there. Lol. Thanks for reviewing to every chapter I have written, individually.**


	12. A Thousand Miles

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or MySpace. I have come to terms with that.**

**Chapter 12 -- A Thousand Miles**

Making my way downtown  
Walking fast  
Faces pass  
And I'm home bound

Staring blankly ahead  
Just making my way  
Making a way  
Through the crowd

And I need you  
And I miss you  
And now I wonder...

If I could fall  
Into the sky  
Do you think time  
Would pass me by  
'Cause you know I'd walk  
A thousand miles  
If I could  
Just see you  
Tonight

It's always times like these  
When I think of you  
And I wonder  
If you ever  
Think of me

'Cause everything's so wrong  
And I don't belong  
Living in your  
Precious memories

'Cause I need you  
And I miss you  
And now I wonder...

If I could fall  
Into the sky  
Do you think time  
Would pass me by  
'Cause you know I'd walk  
A thousand miles  
If I could  
Just see you  
Tonight

And I, I  
Don't want to let you know  
I, I  
Drown in your memory  
I, I  
Don't want to let this go  
I, I  
Don't...

Making my way downtown  
Walking fast  
Faces pass  
And I'm home bound

Staring blankly ahead  
Just making my way  
Making a way  
Through the crowd

And I still need you  
And I still miss you  
And now I wonder...

If I could fall  
Into the sky  
Do you think time  
Would pass us by  
'Cause you know I'd walk  
A thousand miles  
If I could  
Just see you...

If I could fall  
Into the sky  
Do you think time  
Would pass me by  
'Cause you know I'd walk  
A thousand miles  
If I could  
Just see you  
If I could  
Just hold you  
Tonight

**EPOV**

When we get to the hotel, I am still thinking about that girl from the plane. _What if it really was Bella?_ I barely look around the suite that Jasper, Emmett, and I are sharing at the hotel as I put stuff away. After sitting down and standing up for probably the tenth time in the past five minutes, I decide to give Bella a call.

It rings a couple times before a breathless Bella answers "Hey."

"Hey, how are you?" I ask.

"I'm okay. Alice and Rose are not letting me touch my clothes. They want to throw them all out and buy me new ones because apparently these aren't appropriate for Florida." Bella sighs.

I hear a familiar voice in the background yell "Well, we're right! You do need new clothes!"

Suddenly, I realize why that voice sounded so familiar. _That was the voice of the blonde model-type that Emmett was hitting on. That would make the brunette Bella. She was the one who almost fell on me in the plane._ I inhale sharply, sucking some spit from my mouth into my lungs, making me start to cough.

"Edward, are you okay?" a concerned Bella asks.

"Yepp, just fine." I choke out; _I just figured out that you're my soul mate, that's all_.

A phone starts to ring in the background and I hear the blonde answer. Then Emmett comes walking into the room, talking on his phone. It clicks in my head that they're talking to each other. I motion for Emmett to keep it down and I point to my phone and to his. I cover the microphone on my phone and whisper to Emmett to ask Rosalie what they're doing later so we can meet up. He winks and leaves the room.

"Whose phone was that?" I try to sound casual.

"That was Rosalie's phone. She met some guy at the airport and gave him her number. Now they're making plans to meet up. Apparently they have three people in their group, so it would match to ours."

I try not to crack up, "Sounds cool."

"Yeah, I guess. What are you doing?"

"Eh, not much. Just sitting here trying to find something good on the TV."

"Yeah, not much good on, ever. What are you doing later?"

I shrug, trying to add to the casualty of my voice, "not much, probably just hanging out with my friends."

"Sounds cool." She says, repeating what I said earlier.

I chuckle. "Yeah, I guess."

"Hey, can I ask a favor of you?" She asks and I can tell she's nervous.

"Sure, anything."

"Well, you see, Alice and Rose really want to set me up with this mysterious third person in Emmett's group and I was wondering if you could call me later and if this guy's being really creepy if you could maybe pretend to be my boyfriend." She lets out in a rush.

I try not to laugh too hard "Of course. When would you like me to call?"

"Well, it sounds like we're meeting them at the mall then we're having dinner… so like 7-ish?" She sounds relieved.

"Sounds like a plan."

"Thank you so much."

"No problem."

"So Alice wants to play Bella Barbie, so I'll talk to you later?"

"Of course."

"Bye."

"Bye."

We hang up and I start laughing uncontrollably. I fall off the bed and onto the floor, still laughing. Emmett and Jasper come in.

"Hey, man, what's wrong?" Emmett asks.

I wipe the tears from my eyes as I answer as steady as I can "Bella asked me to call her around 7-ish just in case the guy Alice and Rose want to set her up with is a douche and pretend to be her boyfriend."

They look at me with shock then both start laughing as well.

**BPOV**

Alice tortures me for about an hour, doing my hair and makeup. When she's done I do look good. She pulled my hair back into a messy French braid because she knows the humidity will make my hair frizz. She left my makeup looking naturl-ish. She also picks out my clothes. I end up wearing some khaki shorts that I already had and a dark blue tank top.

We borrow Renee's car and drive to the mall. We get out and Alice immediately drags me to Old Navy, which she knows is in my budget. We look around for a bit and Alice grabs armloads of clothing then pushes me towards the dressing rooms with the specific instructions that she is to see everything on me. Sometime during this torture, Rose disappears. After what seems like an eternity, Alice chooses what I'm getting and we leave the dressing room. When we step out, I run into a rack of sundresses. I see one that really catches my eye, it's cobalt blue with spaghetti straps and a cinched waist. Amazingly this time, it is me dragging Alice into the dressing rooms. I throw the dress on and look at myself in the mirror in the dressing room, thoroughly pleased with myself.

"Hey, Alice, I'm coming out!" I yell through the door.

I step out and show Alice, twirling around in a circle with my eyes closed. I look at Alice and smile. "How do I look?" I ask her.

"Beautiful. Absolutely beautiful." A very familiar velvety voice purrs from behind me.

My breath catches in my throat and I look at Alice in shock and a sly smile graces her face. I turn around and look at the man of my dreams, literally, standing there with a goofy grin on his face. He's even more gorgeous in person than his photos show him to be. His bronze hair is even more unruly, almost looking like bed head. His green eyes sparkle. His cheeks have a slight bit of stubble on them. He's wearing a green button down unbutton with the sleeves rolled up and a plain white t-shirt under it and a pair of causal jeans. Even though he's completely covered, it's obvious that his body is very toned. I can feel my face growing redder by the second.

"Breath, Bella." His voice drags me out of my reverie. I take in a deep, shaky breath.

"Hi." I breathe out.

"Hi." He answers.

I feel the urge to run over and hug him, but I don't know what his reaction would be.

"What are you doing here?" I ask him.

"Shopping, you?" he smirks.

I roll my eyes, "I mean in Florida, you dork."

"I don't know about you, but Florida is an amazing place to go for spring break."

I laugh, not sure of how to respond. "I'm going to go change real quick." I say quickly before disappearing into the dressing room.

I take a few deep breaths to steady myself before taking off the dress and changing into my shorts and tank top. _I am definitely getting this dress._

I step out of the changing room and grab Alice and dragging her to the checkout.

"What's he doing here?" I whisper to Alice.

"I thought you knew they were coming." She replies.

"Seriously? Why would you think that?"

"Well… you did know him before…."

"Yeah, but he never even _implied_ that he was coming here!" I respond while paying for my clothing.

Alice shushes me as the rest of the group walks over. Emmett and Rosalie are arguing like it is going out of style, about what, I don't even think they know. Jasper and Alice are making puppy-dog eyes at each other. Edward just looks at me and smiles.

"Sorry about startling you before." He says, smiling sheepishly.

I shrug, "It's okay. I just wasn't expecting you to be there."

"True." He chuckles.

"So what are Emmett and Rosalie arguing about, anyways?" I ask him, purposefully changing the subject.

He looks over at them, "I think originally it was about where we all should go for supper. But I don't know if that's what it is about anymore."

I sigh and pull out a quarter, "Hey, Rose. Heads or tails?"

She rolls her eyes at me, "Heads."

I flip it and it lands on tails. Emmett starts to do a strange dance in place over winning.

"Okay, Emmett, where are we eating?" I ask him.

"T.G.I. Friday's!"

"Okay, but we're doing some more shopping first! It's still early." Alice says, grabbing my arm and pulling me out into the mall.

We wander around for a bit before I drag them into Hot Topic, an appalled Alice close on my heels. As soon as I step into the store, I stop and stare. There, in front of me, is a huge display for Twilight. A smile creeps over my face as I slowly walk to the display. I browse through the t-shirts, looking for my favorite one in my size. I grab it and head straight to the counter before Alice can stop me and pay for it. I ask them to remove the tags so I can wear it.

"You. Are. Not. Wearing. That. Thing." Alice says, glaring at me and pointing at the t-shirt. A very amused Edward is standing right behind her.

"Watch me," I reply.

I take the t-shirt from the heavily pierced sales woman and slip it on over my head. I look down at myself and see Robert Pattison's gorgeous face staring out from my shirt.

I grin and walk past the two and out into the mall where Jasper, Emmett, and Rose are waiting. We pair off and walk to the restaurant together, still carrying our bags.

"So, what is that shirt about, anyways?" Edward asks while we walk.

"So, there's this book series called Twilight and the movie is coming out soon. See, I'm kind of obsessed with it and Alice hates it. This guy," I point to my shirt "plays the male lead. I think he's kind of dreamy." _And he looks just like you…._

I can see a hint of jealousy behind the amusement in his eyes. "Really?"

I laugh at him, "Yeah."

We arrive at the restaurant and are seated. The conversation over dinner flows nicely. Alice, Rose, and I excuse ourselves towards the end to go to the bathroom and talk about the boys, naturally, but as soon as we're in there, my phone rings.

"Hello, Edward." I answer, amused.

"Hello. Well, it's 7-ish and I'm calling to possibly rescue you from your horrid date."

I check the time and laugh at him. "Really?"

"Yeah, how is your date? What's he like?" He asks.

"Well, he's cute and he's funny and I've felt like we've known each other for months. It's going way better than I thought. I'm happy I let Alice and Rose talk me into this."

"Well, good to hear."

"Yeah. How is hanging out with your friends going?" I ask, playing along.

"Well, it's going okay. I met this really cute girl at the mall. She's pretty cool and I was thinking of seeing if she wanted to do something tomorrow."

"Well, that's cool. I hope it goes well for you."

"You too. Have fun."

"Haha. I will."

"Bye."

"Bye."

I hang up and look over at Alice and Rose who are trying to hold in their laughter.

"I know, I know." I roll my eyes at them. "So, what do you two think of the boys?"

"Jasper is amazing." Alice says, her eyes glazing over slightly.

"Well, that's good…" I am slightly concerned about the dreamy expression on her face. "What about you, Rose?"

"Emmett is cool. I really like him. He can keep up with me." She laughs.

I chuckle "Well, that's good."

We finish up and walk back to the table and the guys.

**EPOV**

Jasper, Emmett, and I sit around and talk about the girls while they're in the bathroom. We all agree that they are amazing and perfect for each of us. I try not to dwell on the fact that they live in Washington while we all live in Chicago. I figure it will all work out in time.

I smile at the angel that is walking back to the table. Bella is everything that I imagined her to be. Well, more, actually. It's like she has some gravitational pull on me. I've never felt anything like it. She really did look amazing in that blue dress and I hope that I get to see her in it again.

After paying for dinner, we walk the girls back to their car. We all decide that we will meet up at the beach the next day and do some swimming. I give Bella a hug goodbye and feel that spark between us again, like what happened on the plane. Bella must have noticed it, too, because she looks at me strangely.

"That was you on the plane, wasn't it?"

I chuckle, "Yeah. You know, I wouldn't have minded if you had fallen into my lap."

She blushes a gorgeous pink and smiles, "Sure, tell me now, why don't you?"

I smile and give her another hug, gently kissing the top of her head. I am amazed at how she fits into my arms, like we were made for each other.

"Call me tomorrow when you get to the beach, okay?" I tell her.

"Of course. See you tomorrow." She replies.

"Bye."

"Bye."

The girls get into their car and drive off. I look at Emmett and Jasper and see a similar expression on each of their faces, one mirroring how I feel.

"Well, at least we get to see them tomorrow." I shrug, trying to make myself feel better.

"Yeah." Jasper sighs.

"Let's just go back to the hotel and get some sleep." Emmett decides, leading us back to the rental car, "That way tomorrow will get here faster."

Jasper and I agree and we go back to the hotel and to bed.

_Tomorrow…. I wonder if she really does have a dark blue bikini…._

**

* * *

**

A/N: Song is "A Thousand Miles" by Vanessa Carlton. I know the realistic timeline is off just a little, but deal with it. And I am serious about the Twilight display at the Hot Topic at Mayfair Mall in Milwaukee, WI. It was amazing.

**Okay, so I'm on kind of an adrenaline rush right now. I just got another piercing… that makes 16. And I got my cartilage pierced right above my tragus (some call it a helix). I'm just uneven right now because I just got my left side done. I'm going to get my right side done in a month or two when I have the money.**


	13. For Good

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or MySpace. Stop reminding me.**

**Chapter 13 -- For Good **

I'm limited  
Just look at me - I'm limited  
And just look at you  
You can do all I couldn't do, Glinda  
So now it's up to you  
For both of us - now it's up to you...  
I've heard it said  
That people come into our lives for a reason  
Bringing something we must learn  
And we are led  
To those who help us most to grow  
If we let them  
And we help them in return  
Well, I don't know if I believe that's true  
But I know I'm who I am today  
Because I knew you...  
Like a comet pulled from orbit  
As it passes a sun  
Like a stream that meets a boulder  
Halfway through the wood  
Who can say if I've been changed for the better?  
But because I knew you  
I have been changed for good  
It well may be  
That we will never meet again  
In this lifetime  
So let me say before we part  
So much of me  
Is made of what I learned from you  
You'll be with me  
Like a handprint on my heart  
And now whatever way our stories end  
I know you have re-written mine  
By being my friend...  
Like a ship blown from its mooring  
By a wind off the sea  
Like a seed dropped by a sky bird  
In a distant wood  
Who can say if I've been changed for the better?  
But because I knew you  
Because I knew you  
I have been changed for good  
And just to clear the air  
I ask forgiveness  
For the things I've done you blame me for  
But then, I guess we know  
There's blame to share  
And none of it seems to matter anymore  
Like a comet pulled from orbit  
As it passes a sun  
Like a stream that meets a boulder  
Halfway through the wood  
Like a ship blown from its mooring  
By a wind off the sea  
Like a seed dropped by a bird in the wood  
Who can say if I've been  
Changed for the better?  
I do believe I have been  
Changed for the better  
And because I knew you...  
Because I knew you...  
Because I knew you...  
I have been changed for good...

**BPOV**

The next few days are spent at the beach and the next few nights are spent doing dinner or hanging out somewhere. I love just laying on the beach with my friends, laughing about everything, and just relaxing with them. The guys are pretty awesome, too. We all fit together perfectly. Alice and Jasper are always whispering together. He is the only person I have ever met that can calm her down. It sounds like she is the only person that has brought him out of his shell as well. Emmett isn't as intimidating as he looks; he's really a big softy. Emmett keeps Rose down to earth and happy while she keeps him in check. Edward… well, Edward is just amazing. I think he is perfect and amazing in so many ways, but it would be ridiculous for me to expect it in return. He is quickly becoming a very close friend, but I think maybe it is because we spend almost every second together. The real Edward is so much more amazing than the Edward that I have pictured in my head for the past few months.

Currently, Alice and Rose are playing Bella Barbie because we are all going out tonight. Alice and Rose are quite aware of how desperate I am about Edward and want to push us together. While I have no problem with the solution, I have reservations about how they plan to carry it out. I mean, is there a reason I am going to be wearing three inch heels? I am more likely to fall and break my ankle than make him fall in love with me. I sigh as I stand up and teeter there, catching my balance on the back of the chair I was just sitting on. I carefully make my way to the full length mirror on the back of the door.

The person looking back at me is not me; she is a prettier version of me. Her hair shines more and is curled softly down around her shoulders in a way my frizzy hair would never do. She is wearing makeup, something I don't do. She has more curves than I do, something that is accentuated by the blue sundress that I bought yesterday. Because of her heels, she is also about 3 inches taller than me.

"Wow." I whisper to myself.

Alice bounces happily over to me, hugging me quickly. "Told you so," she whispers to me.

I look over at Rose and she smirks at me while she grabs her purse, "He won't stand a chance." She says happily.

I laugh nervously at what she said as I grab my bag and walk out the door with Alice and Rose.

**EPOV**

Emmett, Jasper, and I sit in the restaurant where we all decided to meet up for dinner.

"So I think we should take our ladies on dates tonight, splitting up and giving us alone time with them." Jasper suggests. While I do agree with him, I do not know how comfortable Bella would be with that. I like her… okay, I've kind of fallen in love with her… but I doubt she likes me back like that.

"What would Rose and I do, though? There's nothing around here!" Emmett whines.

I smirk at him, "I'm sure you could think of something," remembering earlier at the beach where he was practically sucking the skin off her face and neck.

"Oh yeah? What does Mr. Romance over there plan to do with Bella?" Emmett asks, obviously fishing for ideas.

"That's for me to know and you not to." I reply, desperately wracking my brain for ideas.

Just then, Emmett whistles, breaking me out of my reverie.

"Honestly, why do guys think that women find that attractive?" Rose says from behind me. I turn in my chair and see an angel behind Rose. My breath catches in my throat and my heart practically stops. Bella's hair is curled softly around her shoulders. She has minimal makeup on, emphasizing her deep brown eyes and red lips. She's wearing the blue dress I first saw her in at Old Navy and she's wearing heels, which I'm sure she isn't too happy about. Bella blushes and fidgets nervously under my scrutiny. I smile at her reassuringly as I get up and hug her.

"You look beautiful." I whisper in her ear. She looks down at her feet and blushes. I take her hand and lead her to the chair next to the one I was just seated in. I pull hers out for her as she sits down then I sit next to her. I sit back in my seat and sling my arm casually around the back of her chair.

Dinner goes well and we all hold up a playful conversation. At the end, Emmett decides that he and Rose need some time to themselves, which I know means they will be locked up in his hotel room, and Jasper and Alice decide to take a walk by themselves. This leaves Bella and I alone.

She and I share an awkward silence for a second or two, so I decide to break it.

"So… would you like to go to a walk and see where we end up?"

She smiles slightly and her face relaxes a little, "sure, that would be nice."

We walk out of the restaurant and out onto the sidewalk. We walk in silence, though I cannot decide if it is comfortable or not because of how nervous I seem to be. I keep my hands in my pockets, unsure of what else to do with them. Suddenly, Bella is pushed into me by a group of passing people. I wrap my arms around her to make sure she doesn't fall. As we continue, I keep one arm securely around her waist. She occasionally stumbles into me, from the heels, I assume. The silence becomes more comfortable as we continue walking. To where? I don't know.

We end up at a small part of the sidewalk that is jutting out over the river. I pull Bella over to it and lean on the railing, looking out over the river. I sling my arm casually over her shoulders and pull her to my side. She rests her head on my shoulder as she wraps her arms around my waist. I start to feel tension building inside me as I lean my cheek on the top of her head. I am surrounded by her scent; a mixture of freesia and strawberries.

A tension begins to build inside me as I debate whether or not I should kiss her. Heaven knows I want to, but I do not want to offend her. _Say something…_

"Bella, I…" I trail off as she looks up at me, her deep brown eyes seemingly staring straight into my soul. Something in her eyes seems to mirror my own feelings.

**BPOV**

I look up at him, glad that he has broken the tension. I so desperately want to kiss him, but I know that he wouldn't want to kiss me back. His emerald green eyes stare down at me, full of an emotion that I cannot identify. No, wait, yes I can. His eyes seemingly mirror mine, full of wanting and confusion.

Slowly, I reach my hand up to his cheek, resting it there. I guide his face down to mine slowly, not wanting to scare him, and lean up on my tip-toes. I softly press my lips to his, feeling the electrical shock that passes between us. Embarrassed, I lean away.

"Sorry." I mumble, my check burning.

Edward just stands there, staring at me. I look away, tears pricking the corner of my eyes. _Of course he would reject you, stupid_.

Almost too fast for it to register, his hand roughly turns my head back to him and his lips crash into mine. In its shock, my heart forgets to beat. Realizing what is going on, I start to kiss him back, my hands slowly tangling in his hair. He leans me back against the railing, pressing his body to mine. I can feel my cheeks burn as his hand slides down my cheek to cup my chin. My lungs begin to burn as well, making me damn my need to breathe. I break the kiss, breathless, and he leans his forehead against mine.

"Wow." He whispers.

"Yeah," is my brilliant response. I keep my arms up and around his shoulders as I catch my breath.

He moves his head and softly brushes his lips against my forehead, leaving a pleasant tingling sensation in its wake. "We should be getting back."

I sigh, "Yeah, probably." I take his hand, tangling my fingers with his, and walk back to his car.

**EPOV**

Having Bella in my arms and kissing her makes me feel like I am whole. The electricity between us is undeniable and I cannot believe that I thought she didn't like me. As we walk hand-in-hand back to my car, I cannot help but glance over at her and smile. She really is an angel; _she is my soul mate_. I grip her hand tighter in mine at this thought.

When we get to my car, I open the door for her then get in myself. I hold her hand as I drive to her mother's house, maintaining a comfortable silence. All too quickly, I pull in front of her house. I am unsure of what to do.

"Bella, I…"

"Edward, I…"

I smile at her, "you go first."

She smiles back and blushes slightly, "I had a wonderful time."

I suddenly feel relieved, unaware of the fact that I had been nervous for what she had to say. "Me too."

I reach over and brush the hair out of her face, lacing my fingers into her hair and pulling her into me. I kiss her slowly, but with more intensity than before, already aware of what her response will be. All too soon, I run out of breath and pull away. Her lips are slightly swollen and her cheeks are flushed.

She looks at me with slightly glazed eyes. "I'll see you tomorrow," she says breathlessly.

"Okay." Being around her and kissing her makes me lose my rational train of thought.

She steps out of the car and shuts the door behind herself. I watch as she makes her way up the walk and to the door. She opens it then waves back at me, letting me know that it's safe to leave.

"I love you. Be safe." I whisper to her, knowing full well that she cannot hear me.

I turn my Volvo back on and drive back to my hotel, not wanting to know if Rose is still there, but eager for tomorrow so I can see my angel again.

* * *

**A/N: Song is "For Good" from Wicked. Sorry for not updating sooner. I seriously could not think of anything original for them to do. And then I got sick. And I don't know if I'll be able to update this coming week because Jeremy is flying in on Tuesday and then leaving Sunday… and I tend to spend every possible second with him when he's here.**

**ALSO: Picture of Bella's dress is in my profile.**

**Edwardluvermonkey52: She realized it was him and he was being a smartass by calling when he said he would.**

**Edward's La tua Cantante: Hahha. Isn't it? But I always have to get a wrist band. Lol.**

**Arykianna Cullen: What, Far Away? The version I have is Nickelback. And yeah, 16. I am 19. I only had 4 total when I graduated high school a year or so ago and I've kind of went nuts since then. I also have 2 tattoos. Lol.**

**GladeSistas: Haha, it's cool. My babies (6 and 7 month old puppies) are obsessed with Jake… or at least they are in my mind… And Ever After is amazing. It's on E like every weekend. And thanks!**

**Cullendrive: I do! And that is so freaking awesome.**


	14. What Hurts the Most

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or MySpace. -sigh-**

**Chapter 14 -- What Hurts the Most**

I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house  
That don't bother me  
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out  
I'm not afraid to cry every once in a while  
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me  
There are days every now and again I pretend I'm ok  
But that's not what gets me

What hurts the most  
Was being so close  
And having so much to say  
And watching you walk away

And never knowing  
What could have been  
And not seeing that loving you  
Is what I was trying to do

It's hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go  
But I'm doin' it  
It's hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I'm alone  
Still harder, getting up, getting dressed, living with this regret  
But I know if I could do it over  
I would trade, give away all the words that I saved in my heart  
That I left unspoken

What hurts the most  
Was being so close  
And having so much to say  
And watching you walk away

And never knowing  
What could have been  
And not seeing that loving you  
Is what I was trying to do

I'm not afraid to cry every once in a while  
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me  
There are days every now and again I pretend I'm ok  
But that's not what gets me

What hurts the most  
Was being so close  
And having so much to say  
And watching you walk away

And never knowing  
What could have been  
And not seeing that loving you  
Is what I was trying to do

What hurts the most  
Was being so close  
And having so much to say  
And watching you walk away

And never knowing  
What could have been  
And not seeing that loving you  
Is what I was trying to do

**EPOV**

Today is my last day with Bella. I rush through my shower, not wanting to waste a minute, though I do not know why I'm showering because we're spending the day at the beach. I slip on my swim trunks and a shirt then exit my room of the suite. I find Jasper and a very tired looking Emmett on the couch.

"Hey, Em, late night?" I tease him.

He grumbles something at me.

"You just missed Rose leaving." Jasper proclaims. Emmett takes a swipe at his head, but Jasper avoids him. They start to wrestle around the living room area. It ends with Emmett holding Jasper in a head lock and me leaning on a counter laughing hysterically.

"Okay, let's go." I say, wiping tears form my eyes, "the girls are probably waiting for us already."

We get in my rented Volvo and speed to the beach. On the way, Jasper calls Alice to make sure they're there already. We park along the road and go to find the girls, Emmett carrying all of our towels. A very awake looking Rose waves us over to her.

Seeing Bella lying there made my heart stop. In the bright sun of the morning, her pale skin is glowing brighter than normal, practically sparkling. She is wearing a dark blue bikini. On anyone else, her bikini would be modest, but for Bella, this is showing a lot of skin. She is lying on her back on a towel, a book lying open next to her.

"Hey." She breathes.

"Hi." I breathe back as I lie down next to her. She cuddles close to me, resting her head on my shoulder, so I wrap my arm around her. Her other hand draws random circles on my chest and stomach. I don't know how long we lie like this, but I don't care. I open my eyes to the brightness and glance down at Bella's sleeping form. For a few minutes, I just fiddle with the bracelets that she wears, the one that I assume Jacob had given her and the other string bracelet that I assume to be the one she made for me. I lean on my side and bring my hand to her face, caressing her cheek softly. Her soft lips part in a slight smile. I softly kiss her; her forehead, her eyelids, her nose, her cheek, and finally her lips. I sit back and watch her as she wakes up. She stretches slightly then opens her eyes.

"Hey." She breathes for the second time today.

"Hello, sleepy head" I smile at her and kiss her forehead. She smiles at me then stretches up to kiss my lips. I still can't get over how her lips feel to me. It's like we were made perfectly for each other and we move in synch with each other just so. Bella sighs and I take the chance to deepen the kiss, sliding my tongue into her mouth and softly massaging her tongue with mine. I tangle my fingers in her hair, bringing her even closer to me.

Suddenly, something that feels like a football hits the small of my back, making both Bella and I jump. I shift so I can see Emmett rolling in the sand laughing and Rose glaring at him. I shake my head at them and settle back, Bella cuddling close.

**BPOV**

The day passes faster than I want, even though all I am doing is lying with Edward on the beach. Granted, I will be spending practically all night with him at the party for Renee's friend. I just have to remember to give Edward the bracelet I made for him.

"Hey, Edward, what time is it?" Alice calls from her cuddled-up position with Jasper.

"Why can't you have Jasper check?" Edward responds.

"Because we're comfortable," is Alice's brilliant reply.

Edward doesn't respond to her, nor does he make any move to check the time.

"Bella?" comes Alice's singsong voice, "can you have Edward check what time it is?"

"Check it yourself, Alice." I reply, getting annoyed at her myself.

"Fine," she sighs exasperatedly. "Holy Shit! It's already 4:30!! We have to start getting ready for the part!!" Alice jumps up and starts packing her stuff away.

I feel Edward glance down at me. "The party isn't until 9:30, right?" He asks me.

"Yes! But us girls take time to get ready for parties" Alice practically screams at Edward.

"By 'us girls' she means Rose and herself." I mumble to Edward, sure Alice cannot hear me.

"Actually, Bella, it takes us longer to get you ready than ourselves." Rose adds from where she and Emmett were practically having sex on the beach not 2 minutes ago.

"Well, you don't have to do my hair and makeup. I am quite fine going with no makeup on and my hair how it normally is." I quip.

"Well, if you didn't fight us about doing your hair and makeup, it wouldn't take 2 hours to do." Alice adds in, standing over me with her hands on her hips. "Now, let's get a move-on." She starts poking at us with a dainty sandal-clad foot.

All through this exchange, Edward had been watching us like he was at a table-tennis tournament. "Okay, okay, just stop poking me with your foot." He waves his arm at Alice's leg, apparently trying to catch it and make her lose her balance.

The six of us pack up our stuff and the guys carry our stuff to the car we are borrowing from Renee. Edward kisses me goodbye and I drive us to Renee's house.

**EPOV**

Seriously? 5 hours to get ready? How could it _possibly_ take them 5 hours to get ready? I was half tempted to drop by Renee's house and rescue Bella. But, I knew that if I did that, I would feel the wrath that is Alice and Rose.

I let my head fall back on the couch, sinking further into it. I close my eyes, mentally resting and preparing myself for later tonight. My left hand slides into my pocket and takes out the charm that I had bought for Bella. I open my eyes and look at it, shifting it so that light catches it and throws rainbows everywhere.

_Flashback_

I have to get something for Bella's charm bracelet_. I walk down a slushy Michigan Avenue in Chicago, trying to find a store to buy a charm for her. I have been able to get up and walk around by myself now for awhile, but this it the first time I've really been out by myself for something other than school. _Tiffany's? No, she'd find out somehow and I would never hear the end of it… and she would probably return it. Besides, we're not even together._ I sigh and walk to Water Tower Place and into the Macy's. I walk around the jewelry counters, looking at all of the things I wish I could get for her. The sales women follow me like hawks; the younger ones obviously checking me out (_like I would even think about touching any of that, yuck_), and the older ones trying to determine if I will actually buy something. I walk around aimlessly, not really finding something. _

_I stop dead and stare. _That's it_. It's a tiny heart-shaped pendant. It looks like glass and is cut so that the light reflects everywhere. I wave the sales woman over and ask her to get it out for me. I hold it to the light and watch the light shine everywhere. I check the price tag and shrug; _she won't kill me too bad._ Not that I mind spending money on her. I just know that she's not the type of girl that wants something expensive. _I have to stop thinking like she's my girlfriend_. I have the sales woman put a clasp on the pendant so that it will fit onto the bracelet, then she wraps it up and hands it to me with a wink. She slips me a piece of paper with her name and number on it. I grimace and crumple it up, letting it fall to the floor discretely, and walk back out onto the street._

_End Flashback._

"She really will like it." Jasper startles me out of my reverie. I realize that I've been staring at the way the light refracts out of the pendant the entire time.

I sigh and put it back into my pocket, "I know. I just hope that she'll accept it."

Jasper nods, "she's not the type of girl that really likes people spending money on her, is she?"

I shake my head at him.

He shrugs back, "I guess she'll just have to get used to it then."

I crack a smile at him, "yeah." I sober up, thinking of him and Alice. "So what are you going to do about your Alice?"

"My Alice?" He responds, obviously surprised, "I don't know, I haven't really thought about it."

I snort, "Yeah, right. You obviously like each other and tonight is going to be the last time you see one another."

He smiles and shakes his head, "No, it won't. I figure you and Bella are going to be seeing more of each other, so she and I are bound to run into each other eventually."

I smile and nod, "True. But still, you have to have something planned out. I know you better than that."

He shakes his head, "Honestly, I don't have a plan. I'm just going to see what she wants out of it. I don't know if she will want to see me again or not. Ya know, she might just want this to be a spring break fling thing and have that be the end of it." He shrugs.

"Well, whatever." I glance at the clock. "We should probably get going. I don't know where this house is and it would be our luck to get lost and not make it there till midnight."

Jasper and I gather Emmett from where he was passed out in his room and practically push him out to the car.

* * *

We arrive at the party about a half hour later, mostly because Emmett needed to stop and get something to eat… even though there will be food at the party. The beach-front property is decorated nicely, if not slightly over the top; tikki torches line the walks and loud luau music blasts from the back. The servers are all dressed in grass skirts and coconuts with leighs around their necks. _Bella did mention that the party was a luau theme…. Speaking of, where is she?_ Emmett, Jasper, and I wander randomly around the party trying not to be conspicuous since we technically didn't know anyone here yet. We end up standing around by the food table (of course), waiting for the girls.

About a half hour after the party began, the girls finally waltz in. Rose is wearing a bright pink and red minidress with a Hawaiian flower print. Alice is wearing a green dress similar to Rose's, only hers is knee length. And then, there's Bella. She is wearing a blue print sundress that is ankle length and flowy with flip flops. Her hair is in loose waves that cascade around her small face and shoulders. The light from the torches makes her skin glow.

The girls see us and walk over to us and greet us. I pull Bella to me and give her a hug and kiss the top of her head, breathing in the scent of her hair. She giggles and pushes me away.

"Sorry, but my mom's here somewhere and I don't want to have to explain why a guy is kissing me, especially one that she's never even heard of," she whispers with a slight smile.

I smile back and nod my head at her and let her know that I understand. I try to inconspicuously slide a finger or two into her hand so that I'm still touching her. I've found myself craving her touch, even if it is just a little bit of handholding. She squeezes my finger and leans into my side slightly.

The girls (well, Alice and Rose) decide to drag us out and dance. Bella blushes and tries to stay behind.

"I'm not too big on the dancing. You know, the whole clumsy thing." Bella smiles shyly and looks away.

I place a hand on the small of her back, pushing her out onto the dance floor. "You know, it is all in the leading." I smile at her, trying to reassure her.

She rolls her eyes at me, but does not resist. We slowly sway to the music, with a distance between us that would rival a middle school-aged couple at a Catholic school dance. I slowly pull her closer to me so that her head is resting against my shoulder and my arms are around her. Just swaying this way to the music, holding her this close, feels right. _I know that I haven't actually known her for very long, but I feel like I've known her my entire life. _

**BPOV**

I rest my head against his shoulder, slowly swaying to the music. I breathe in his scent, letting myself relax into his embrace. This feels right, like we were meant to dance together. I fit perfectly into his arms. I snuggle closer into him, wishing we were alone.

The dance music stops, and I reluctantly step back from Edward. He smiles at me, but something looks different about his smile. I can't quite place it, and I don't know if I want to. He looks conflicted, somehow. I shrug it off and follow me where he's leading.

"Do you want to go for a walk? It's getting late and we still have to say our goodbyes." He looks back at me sadly as he asks this.

I nod in agreement, not really wanting to say goodbye to him, but know I should do it now.

We walk along the beach away from the other people, not saying anything to each other. He takes my hand and continues walking. He seems like he wants to say something, but can't find the words. We come to a small section of rocks that forms a kind of bench, so we sit down. He slings his arm around my shoulder and I lean into him, not wanting to break the silence between us, but know I should.

"I have that bracelet I promised you." I say as I start to untie it from my wrist.

"Really? I thought you had forgotten about it." He chuckles.

"How could I do that?" I take his free arm and try to tie the bracelet around his wrist. "It doesn't quite fit. I guess I didn't make it long enough." I sigh, slightly frustrated.

"Here, let me have it." He takes his arm from around my shoulder, much to my dismay. He takes the bracelet from me and fiddles with it. "What do you think?" He holds his left hand out for me to see. Around his left hand ring finger is my bracelet, wrapped around it twice and tied securely. This gesture startles me, and it must have showed on my face. His face fell, "I can take it off, if you want." He starts to untie it.

I place my hand on his, stopping him. "No, I like it. Really. It just surprised me, is all." I lace my fingers in his and lean my head against his shoulder.

"Okay, you just had me worried there for a second. By the way, I got you something. It's a charm for your bracelet. I'd understand if you didn't want to put anything on there, but I was hoping that it would be okay."

"Really, you didn't have to get me anything." I hate when people spend money on me.

"Yes I did, now hush up." He kisses my forehead then reaches into his pocket on the other side of his pants and gets something out. The light from the moon sparkles off of it. He places it into my free hand so that I can look at it. It is a small clear heart that looks like it's made of glass, but is lighter than it should be.

"It's beautiful. Thank you." I close my hand around it and kiss his lips softly.

"You're welcome. Let me put it on your bracelet." He twists the bracelet so that the wolf charm is at the exact opposite end of the heart. I wiggle my wrist so that the charms dance.

"I love it." I smile up at him. He slowly leans in and kisses me softly. I tangle my free hand in the hair at the bas of his neck, pulling him closer. I know that this will probably be the last time that I get to kiss him for who knows how long. I run my tongue across his lip. His mouth opens and I slip my tongue into his. They tangle together as we pull closer. His hand buries itself in my hair and pulls me even closer so that I am practically straddling his lap. I break the kiss, unsure of where this is going, and lean my forehead against his. He wraps his arms around my waist, keeping me securely on his lap.

"I will see you again." He whispers to me, obviously sure of that.

"Okay." I am not sure how to answer him. I know that I love him, but I do not want to push him away or rush into anything.

"I don't know how, but I will." He says, as if he could read my mind and see all of my insecurities.

"Mmkay." I hold back my tears at the thought of him leaving, not wanting to shed them in front of him. "We should get back."

He sighs, "I know."

He helps me slide off his lap and onto firm ground. He catches my hand as I turn to go and brings me close to him, looking me in the eyes. He brings his hand to my face and draws his thumb across my cheek tenderly.

"I will see you again. I promise." He states, as if I didn't believe him before.

"I know. I believe you." I look back at him and smile slightly.

He smiles back at me, "okay, just making sure." He leans down and kisses me once more. It seems sad, but then we are saying goodbye.

I give him a hug, squeezing as hard as I possibly can, not wanting to walk back to the party. I sigh and step back, willing my feet to go where I myself do not want to go. We walk back to the party hand in hand, not looking at each other and not speaking. Alice and Rose are in the midst of saying their goodbyes to their respective non-boyfriend for the week.

Without saying a word to each other, Edward and I part and I walk with Rose and Alice to our car. Before stepping in, I look back at Edward and wave a good bye. He waves a reluctant good bye in return.

I get into the driver's seat and turn on the car, turning the radio all the way down; I do not want music now. I check my mirrors and drive away, watching Edwards diminishing form in the rear-view mirror, trying not to let my tears fall.

"Well, this sucks." Rose says so eloquently from the passenger seat.

"I agree." Alice squeaks from the back. "When are they coming to visit?"

I shrug in return, not trusting my voice, and hope that Edward will keep his promise.

* * *

**A/N: Song is "What Hurts the Most" by CASCADA. I think it was also done by Rascal Flatts. **

**I'm baaAAAaaack….!!! *insert creepy laughter here***

**Anywho, Merry Christmas! Sorry this took so long getting out. I've been done with the semester for about a week and a half now, but I've been busy doing stuff here. I would have posted earlier, but I got busy with family stuff… and then I started watching the Star Trek marathon on Sci-Fi. Hehhehe.**

**Oh, I suggest that you all read the Left Behind series. It's written by Tim LaHaye and Jerry B. Jenkins. The story is really good, even if it is a religious book. My friend is currently lending me the first 6 books over break and I am about to start the 6****th**** book. *sadface.* It is about what happens after the Rapture, following a pilot and his daughter, a religious scholar and a journalist, through the events foretold in Revelations. Like I said, religious, but with an interesting story line and good characters. **

**My thoughts on the Twilight movie…. (Please don't hurt me for any of this)… I did not like it. I mean, it was okay… but it was like the book on fast forward. They did not talk about Alice and Jasper's powers. And Rose had more lines than Alice did. I am kind of disappointed in it. I would have sat through a 3-hour movie if they had done it right. And… Jeremy (the boyfriend) agrees with me and he's not even a fan or anything, he's just read the books once through.**

**And on a random note: watching dogs dream is hilarious… especially two of them at once… when one of them sleeps on her back and snorts like a pig....**

**Just letting you know, there will be one more chapter of this story left. Yes, just one more. It will be much happier than this chapter, I promise. I still plan on writing a sequel, but I don't know when it will be done. I should have the next chapter up before Monday, mainly because I will be flying to visit Jeremy on Monday and will be with him for 2 weeks.**


	15. I Think I'm Ready

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or MySpace.**

**Chapter 15 -- I Think I'm Ready**

I'm used to opening my own doors and splitting the checks  
He introduced me, was always just a friend  
I bought a new dress, he never noticed  
Always falling for these bad boys, such a challenge  
I'm getting tired, of cleaning up after them  
I think I'm ready to be a woman

Oh love, I think I'm ready  
Ready for it

You were such a surprise  
An unexpected gift  
Said I was pretty, and I believed it  
Not really used to all this attention  
Told myself I don't deserve you  
And this is just a phase  
Could I get used to, being loved the right way?  
I wanna argue, but there is nothing to say

Oh love, I think I'm ready  
Ready for it  
Ready for it  
Oh love, I think I'm ready

Cuz you send me flowers, when there's no occasion  
Yeah we talk for hours, you still wanna listen  
Won't hold it against me if I just need you to hold me tonight  
My mother always told me that you'd show up one day  
So scared to feel this way but love, I think I'm ready  
Ready for it  
Ready for it  
Oh love, I think I'm ready  
Ready for it  
Ready for it  
Oh love, I think I'm ready

**BPOV**

One month. Just one month. How can 30 days change my life this much? Just a month ago, I was fantasizing about Edward; how he would hold me, how he would look at me, how he would kiss me. But then spring break happened and I don't have to fantasize anymore. I know how he would hold me, look at me, kiss me.

I sigh and sit back against my headboard, an open book in my lap and my cell phone sitting on it. Edward and I have been texting back and forth while he is waiting around before one of his AP Exams while I waste time reading before school starts. For the past 2 ½ weeks since we said our goodbyes, he and I have been side-stepping around our obvious attraction to one another. I don't want to bring it up because I honestly don't want to push him away from me; if that was all he wanted to happen between us and to just talk now, I am quite okay with that, so long as I can still talk to him. Why can't he just ask me out? Okay, so, yeah, we live 2,000-odd miles from each other. But still. It's getting way too hard for me to talk to him without revealing my feelings for him.

My phone vibrates, meaning I have a new text message.

"Hey, so we're going to start in a few minutes, so I should turn my phone off. TTYL?" REPLY.

"Of course. Give me a call after school or something. Good luck on your fun AP Exam! ILY." SEND.

_Oh shit. No no no no no no! I did not just type "ILY!" What is he going to think?! Quick, good excuse… I know, I say that to all my friends and it slipped so don't read into it! Yea, that should work…. Yeah, right._

I get up, burying my phone under the blanket on my bed, refusing to wait around and look at it. I finish getting ready for the day, purposefully leaving the phone in my room under the blankets.

**EPOV**

"Of course. Give me a call after school or something. Good luck on your fun AP Exam! ILY."

I stare at her words written across the screen of my phone. _'ILY.' Does that mean what I think it means? Did she mean it like that?_ Her words bounce around in my head, distracting me from the AP Exam that I should be focusing on. I don't really care right now how many moles of Cl need to be added to H2O to have the concentration be raised 20%. Really, I don't. I don't want to balance this chemical equation, either. I just want to know what Bella meant by ILY! I scribble out the answers as quickly as I can, knowing I really should care more than I do.

I finish the AP Exam as quickly as possible, just ready to be done with it, and walk out to the other room where we are supposed to wait till our next class starts so that we're not interrupting anyone. Chemistry was my last one, having already taken English, Music Theory, Biology, and Calculus. My bran is practically dead by now and I'm just ready to graduate… even though that's for another month or so. Tomorrow night, which is Friday, Jasper, Emmett, and I are going to a party to celebrate, since we will be practically done with high school. I sigh and put my head down on the table, waiting for Jasper to finish as well. I finally decide to not respond to Bella's text and just call her after she's done with her classes. Someone comes out of the room and sits next to me.

"That was something, wasn't it?" Jasper says from next to me.

"Yeah," I mumble, my head still on the table, "my brain kind of hurts."

"Haha, yeah, mine too."

"Hey, so can I talk to you about something? It's about Bella." I ask him, lifting my head from the table. He should know how to solve my problem.

"Course. What is it?" He leans forward, propping his chin on his hand on the table.

"Okay, so it's a few things, really. Here, read this." I pull out my phone and show him the text message.

He reads it and whistles, "Does that mean what I think it means?"

I shrug, "Iunno, I didn't respond. I've been wondering the same thing. I'm thinking of just asking her about it after school."

"That works."

"I'm thinking about asking her to be my girlfriend, too."

He claps me on the back and smiles, "Good for you. I knew you'd find the guts to do it."

I laugh at him, "Shut up. Do you think she'll say yes?"

He just looks at me. "You've got to be shitting me. Of course she'll say yes."

"Okay, good. I was going to call Alice or something and ask her to get her advice, but I don't think she'd keep her mouth shut about it."

Jasper laughs at me, "True, she can have a big mouth on her."

"Speaking of, are you guys still talking?"

"Yeah, I was going to ask her to be my girlfriend soon, too."

I clap him on the back in the same way he did me, "I'm proud of you too, man. She's good for you."

**BPOV**

All day, I obsess over those three letters that I had texted Edward. Alice and Rose tell me to calm down, but worrying is something that I do constantly without even thinking about it.

I plod up the stairs to my room and I plop my bag on my bed, almost afraid to look at my phone. I pick up the blankets like I'm afraid of a centipede being there and look at my phone.

Nothing. No new notifications.

I sigh in relief and sit on the bed. As soon as my body relaxes, Edward's ringtone start to play. I stare at my phone, contemplating if I should answer it. After four rings, I answer it, trying to sound normal.

"Hey." I say, forcing my voice to sound normal.

"Hey. How's it going?"

I shrug, thinking it will help my voice sound nonchalant, "It's going. I just got home from school. How are you? How did your exam go?"

"It went well. I won't know for like three months, though."

"That sucks, but it's good that you think it went alright."

"Yeah…. hey, so I have a question."

My heart starts thumbing so hard I'm surprised he couldn't hear it through the phone. "Okay, shoot." I try to keep my voice steady.

"What did you mean in your text earlier?"

"What are you talking about?" I say, feigning ignorance.

"I think you know what I'm talking about."

I sigh and say the first thing that comes to mind, "Well, it's something I usually text to my friends and I had been texting with Alice at the same time, and I guess it kind of just slipped out."

"Oh, okay." I thought he sounded slightly disappointed, but I didn't want to get my hopes up.

"Yeah, sorry if it sounded weird. I didn't mean to freak you out or anything."

"Naw, it's okay. I was just curious."

"Okay, then." I smile, relieved that I didn't push him away.

We spend the next hour and a half till Charlie comes home talking on the phone because tomorrow he's going to a party and won't be able to talk.

* * *

The next day goes by slowly, even for a Friday, knowing that I won't be able to talk to Edward. I go to bed early for lack of anything better to do. I drift off to sleep thinking about Edward and his amazing kisses.

I awake to my phone playing Edward's ringtone. I glance at my alarm clock and see that it's almost 3 AM. Why is Edward calling me at 3 AM??

"Hullo?" I ask, the sound of sleep still prevalent in my voice.

"Hey, Bella!" Edward's voice comes through the phone, sounding strange. He's probably drunk. _Great. Edward's drunk dialing me._

"Hello, Edward. What do you want?"

"I just wanted to hear your voice." His voice sounds slightly slopping and I'm getting irritated.

"That's great, Edward. I was sleeping."

"I know, honey. I'm sorry." He sounds like he's sorry. But what's with the 'honey'?

"Okay, Edward. I'm going back to sleep now."

"No! Wait, Bella. One thing."

I sigh, "Okay, Edward. Shoot."

"Well, I think you should be my girlfriend."

I sit there stunned. "Uh, okay, Edward."

"Really? You'd be my girlfriend?"

I roll my eyes, "Yes, Edward. I'll be your girlfriend. Now I'm going to bed. Call me in the morning."

"Okay, honey. ILY!" He says goofily.

"Bye, Edward." I hang up on him, trying to decide if I should be annoyed. While my heart is excited that he asked me out, I'm not as excited as I think maybe I should be. He was drunk and he asked me out. I shake my head and fall back asleep. _Does that count?_ I wonder as I drift.

**EPOV**

I wake up with a pounding headache and reach for the glass of water and ibuprofen that I had placed on my nightstand the night before. I down the ibuprofen and the glass of water as quickly as possible. I sit up in bed and hold my pounding head in my hands, trying to remember everything about last night. So, there was alcohol. I think there was a drinking game? And Bella's voice. Oh shit. I called Bella. When I was drunk. She probably hates me now. Wait, what did I say to her? Did I really ask her out?? I have to call her.

I dial her number and wait for her to answer.

"Hello," she answers, sounding wary.

"Hey, Bella." I sound like shit.

"Oh, hey. How's it going?" She asks, obviously concerned.

"I have a headache, but other than that I'm good."

"That's good."

I decide to just cut to the chase. "Hey, did I ask you out last night?"

"Yeah…?" Again, she sounds wary.

"Did you say yes?" I am hopeful that she really did say yes and that she doesn't regret it.

"Yeah….?" She manages to make it sound like a question.

"Okay, Good." I am relieved that she said yes.

"You meant it, right?"

I have to stop myself from laughing. "Of course I meant it. Why wouldn't I mean it?"

"I don't know. Just checking." She sounds relieved as well. Knowing her, she was probably worried that I was just asking her because I was drunk.

"Hey, I should probably go. I just woke up and feel like crap and should probably take a shower."

"Okay, give me a call later. Have fun." I can hear the smile in her voice.

"Not without you. Bye." I hang up before she can reply to that one, amazed at what I had said to her.

It suddenly hits me that Bella is my girlfriend. _Bella. The beautiful amazing person that I fell in love with months ago. Seriously. I'm dating her._ I jump up and down on my bed, laughing hysterically, unable to contain my excitement any longer.

There's a knock at my door and my mom peeks her head in.

"Honey, are you alright?"

I think about how I must look; a 17 year old man, jumping up and down on his bed in his boxers, laughing like a mad man. That image just makes me laugh harder.

"Yes, mom. I just asked out the most amazing woman in the world and she said yes." I say through my laughter.

She gives me a puzzled look, obviously trying to determine if I've finally snapped, "Okay, honey. Just don't break your bed." She closes the door behind her and leaves me alone.

I try to calm down as I strip down and step in the shower, trying to figure out how to pull off seeing her again… because I will see her again. I love her. I shrug and think about Bella, not worrying that my thoughts are inappropriate. _She is my girlfriend after all_. I smile. _Bella is my girlfriend._

**BPOV**

_Edward meant it. He seriously meant it._

I roll around on my floor laughing with tears falling down my face. I text Alice and Rose to tell them. They are almost as excited about it as I am. Almost, not quite.

Charlie knocks on my door and asks if I am okay.

"Yes, dad!" I decide that maybe it isn't the best idea to tell him about Edward right now.

He grumbles something about never understanding teenage girls and walks away, which just makes me laugh harder.

_Edward and I are seriously dating. When will I see him again?_ That thought immediately sobers me. _Oh well. We're dating and that's all that matters._ I sigh and lean back against the wall, content to just think about Edward without having to apologize to my heart for fantasizing.

**The End.**

* * *

**A/N: Song is "I Think I'm Ready" by Katy Perry.**

**So I just put down a random thing that I remembered from doing AP Chem. I know, it's been a few years, so it's prolly wrong in some way (that was my junior year of high school). I do remember that I really liked balancing chemical equations, though. **

**So the ILY thing happened with Jeremy and me. I texted him that when I was at Band Camp and I used the same lame excuse when he asked me about it. Yeah, he saw through it. Lol.**

**And Jeremy asked me out using the same words… only he wasn't drunk at the time. It was actually my 18****th**** birthday at 3 AM my time and he was on his way to work (day shift sucks) and he was still half asleep. Yeah, I still tease him about it, obviously.**

**Okay, so they were kind of sickening at the end, I admit. A little too happy. But oh well. I blame it on Edward's hangover. **

**The sequel will be started when I get the chance. Most likely before the new semester starts in the middle of January. I might try to write something when I'm down at Jeremy's, but I'm not making any promises.**

**Have a good New Year's!**


	16. AN

A/N

I have not yet started on a sequel for In Love With Your Ghost. So stop asking about that. I have not had the time, and asking me about it doesn't make me any closer to starting/finishing it. It just annoys me.

And my boyfriend might be writing a fanfic and I'd be posting it here for him (or I might write it for him), if you want to know basic plot, ask and I'll tell a little about it.

Yeah, that's all.

Kthanks.


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